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Seasons

2012-02-18T16:58:00.003-08:00

It’s the middle of winter; spring is still several weeks away, yet before we know it, flowers will be in bloom, the grass will become green again, and everything that once looked lifeless will awake from its winter hibernation. I love the seasons, and those of us who live in the south experience the four seasons to some degree. Just as God created the seasons of nature, He also gave us seasons in our lives.

In my present season, my husband and I still have two kids at home to raise, a teen-ager and a pre-teen. Whew! In today’s culture, that is a very daunting task, to say the least, but we will survive. We love our girls, but at each age, raising children brings joy and some very real challenges.

Some of you ladies are empty-nesters; I have heard from those who have gone through this season, that it brings mixed emotions; sometimes joy (Yea! They are finally out of the house), to confusion (What am I suppose to do now?), to sadness (I miss taking care of my kids!). It will be a little while longer before I can relate to this season…I sometimes wonder how I might feel.

Some of you dear sisters are newly married, or starting families and have very young kids at home. I call that the season of “beginnings”, when you experience adjusting to a new spouse, or becoming a mom for the very first time; I remember those days.

Some of you are in your golden years, enjoying retirement, spoiling grandchildren, or maybe perhaps having to take care of an elderly parent or relative. Also, with aging comes our very own health issues…new aches and pains that seem to spring up quite frequently!

Whatever season of life you find yourself in, make the most of it. At every age, God has a plan for our lives. One of my favorite Scriptures in the whole Bible is Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” In every season it’s good to know that with the Lord we have hope and a future.

So ladies, enjoy your season!

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1

Our Greatest Valentine

2012-02-14T13:34:00.004-08:00

Well ladies, it’s that time of year again. . .hearts, flowers, candy, maybe dinner, and red, red everywhere! I actually don’t mind all the red; it happens to be my favorite color! I hope you all have a very nice heart day, and that you get a great gift from that special someone. But if Valentine’s Day 2012 turns out to be just another day, we can celebrate the fact that we have the Greatest Valentine ever. What do I mean?

We can take Valentine’s Day and make it a special day to celebrate the lover of our souls, the Lord Jesus Christ! To honor the Lord, I wanted to come up with an acronym for V-A-L-E-N-T-I-N-E, so here it goes:

V – HE is VICTORIOUS….He conquered sin and the grave!

A – HE is ALMIGHTY….There is no one more powerful!

L – HE is LOVE…The apostle John expressed it so well when he proclaimed that God is Love!

E – HE is ETERNAL…He lives forever, and we will also live forever with Him in heaven!

N –HE is NEAR…..He is available to all those who call upon His name!

T –HE is TRUTH…..He cannot lie, and we can always trust His words!

I – HE is IMMUTABLE…..He cannot change; He is the same yesterday, today, and forever!

N –HE is the only NAME by which we must be saved….Salvation is in Him alone!

E – HE is EXALTED…..His glory fills all of the earth!

Let’s celebrate JESUS!! HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!!

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16

Time

2012-02-13T14:00:00.000-08:00

Ladies, it is hard to believe that 2012 is already about a month and half old! Where does the time go? Sometimes it does seem that the older you get, the faster time flies; of course, we know that this is not literally true, it just appears that way. But why is that? I imagine that as we get older, we sometimes have a lot of things on our minds and on our “plates”, a lot of activities going on with our families, churches, jobs, communities, etc. All these things seem to compete for our attention. As we attempt to deal with everything going on in our lives, before we know it, a day has gone by, a week, a month, a year, two years, a decade!

In this era of smart phones, ipads, ipods, and similar electronic devices, many of us can schedule events or to-do lists at the click of a button or by typing a few words on a keypad. (I must admit, I still operate in the “stone age” since my day planner on my desk serves the purpose for me. . . not very techno savvy, but it gets the job done!) So with all of this help to keep things on task, why do we still struggle?

Have you ever stopped to contemplate this thing called “time”? We all have it; some of us wish we had more of it. We all are given 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, yet we still frequently complain that we don’t have enough time to get all our tasks done. Perhaps, we need to spend some time with the Creator of time to help us budget our time.

The Lord is concerned with every detail of our lives, including how we spend our time. In fact, He tells us in Ephesians 5:16 to “make the most of your time”(NASB). Also, the passage in Luke 10:38-42 is a classic example of what the Lord commends as the best use of our time. Ladies, you are familiar with the story. . . Martha is busy doing all these things for Jesus, and Mary is sitting at the Lord’s feet, soaking up His every word. The Lord rebukes Martha for all her distracted busyness and commends Mary for taking the time to learn from Him. We all at times have many things to do, but it makes sense to sit at Jesus’ feet and let Him direct our days. Martha was too preoccupied with her many preparations; she merely needed to spend time with the Lord first, letting Him speak to her heart.

I have learned that when I give my days to the Lord, busy or not so busy, it’s amazing that I have all the time to do all the things I NEED to do. Some things may have to wait until another day. When your days seem overwhelming, sit at the Lord ‘s feet in prayer and in His Word, and watch how you have SUFFICIENT TIME to carry out the necessary tasks of the day.

“There is really only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it—and I won’t take it away from her.” Luke 10:42 (New Living Translation)

Valentine Banquet

2012-02-11T06:41:00.000-08:00

Tonight we're having our annual Church Valentine Banquet. My husband and I began this tradition four years ago. He and I cook the food and serve the people. The menu is homemade lasagna, salad and bread. We ask the guests to bring drink and desserts.

We also arrange for entertainment. In previous years, Bro. Al Mahan from Smithville, TN provide the musical entertainment. (Google him and book him if you get a chance.) This year we are looking forward to our entertainment-- Dr. Farris Jordan; a motivational speaker from Knoxville, TN. We have been privileged to hear him at several conferences and every time we have laughed so hard it brought tears to our eyes. (Google him....he is available for bookings too.)

I am telling you all of this because....this simple little event has made a GREAT IMPACT and a GREAT DIFFERENCE in our ministry at Whites Creek Baptist Church. This is a time where we let our hair down and enjoy each other's fellowship in a very casual, relaxed atmosphere. Over the past four years, we have grown in numbers and also grown closer together as a church family. Remember....we are bi-vocational, so we minister to a smaller church. The first year, we had approximately 25 that attended. This year, we have over 80 that have signed up. (The members are allowed to bring prospects.)

Not ONLY is it a GREAT time for our members to grow closer together, it is a WONDERFUL time to reach out to prospects. Sometimes it is easier to get them to attend a "social setting" than preaching for the first time. This year, we have at least 8 couples attending our banquet that do not attend church regularly anywhere else. Please pray for them.

Sometimes....simple little things make a HUGH DIFFERENCE. I know all of you have stories to share...........what are some of the "little things" that you and your husband have done in your ministry to make a difference in the moral of the congregation? I'd love to hear your ideas.

Valentines

2012-02-10T05:00:00.000-08:00

LOVE IS IN THE AIR....

HAPPY EARLY VALENTINE'S DAY
Celebrate,Tuesday, February 14, 2012!!

Protecting Our Marriages - Part 2

2012-02-09T05:00:00.000-08:00

Protecting Yourself from Other Men....

Women are different from men. Most men focus on visual and physical. Women focus on emotions and if we are not careful, we will find ourselves caught up and guilty of adultery. You may feel like you are not in danger at all. Let’s stop and look at the big picture and re-think that. We are ALL IN DANGER and MUST protect ourselves. Satan will attack women different from men, but he will attack both of us.

1. Beware of emotional adultery. Most women, especially pastor’s wives will say that they are not in danger, but sister, is there a particular man meeting your emotional needs ---more than your husband? Do you find yourself looking forward to the attention of another man be it at work, at the gym, at church or anywhere else? Is he feeding your ego, encouraging you, showing care for you and filling your head with warm words. Do you enjoy spending time with him and enjoy his company? BUT…you say, we are not doing anything wrong…This is what Satan would like for you to believe. If you had to move away or if he had to move away, would you miss him? If your answer is yes, then you had better WATCH OUT. Remove yourself from the situation even if it means quitting your job or quitting the activity that puts you in each other's company. You are playing with fire and are in danger of emotional adultery which eventually leads to physical adultery.

2. Don’t spend time alone with another man. Do not give Satan that chance to temp you. Sin demands opportunity. Just like it is foolish for our husbands to counsel women alone (they should either invite us to join them or another man or at least leave the door open while others are close by)….it is also foolish and dangerous for us to put ourselves in that position of being alone with another man. I know…it seems silly, but it is better to look silly and be overly cautious than to later be sorry. Never give Satan room to destroy us. At the same time, be careful with the computer. Technology is a wonderful tool, but Satan has used it in facebook, emails, messaging, etc. to destroy many home. Do to allow the same to happen to you. It is EASY to type or text the exact words the other person wants to hear.

3. Control your thoughts. Keep your thought pure. Be careful of what you watch on TV. Be careful of the music you listen to and be careful of the books and literature you read. Satan is looking for areas to tempt you without you even realizing it. Filling your minds full of trash will cause you to fantasize which in truth is just plain ole lust. Sin. “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he:” (Prov. 23:7) Clean up your thought life because thoughts almost always lead to action.

4. Work on your relationship with your husband. By working on your relationship and keeping God in your lives you are protecting yourself and your marriage. Keep God FIRST and our husbands SECOND. Keep the communication open with your husband. YOU be the one to play on his ego and encourage him and brag on him. Be there for him.

I know you are wondering why I have spoke of being faithful for two days. God laid it on my heart to share these words. Just this week, I have been told of two more ministers' homes that have been destroyed by adultery. These were good people from good homes. They never MEANT for it to happen, but they let their guards down and got caught in Satan's web of sin. They were just like you and I and thought it could never happen to them. Let's keep our guards up and protect ourselves, protect our husbands and protect our marriages.

Let's keep our marriages pure and not become a statistic. Marriage is a precious gift from God.

Congratulations!!

2012-02-09T04:52:00.000-08:00

I would like to take this time to congratulate my husband, Roger. His secular job is with Unum Insurance Company in Chattanooga, where he works from home as a Computer Engineer. Yesterday, during a special program where everyone had to come into the office, he was awarded the "Aspire Award" which is the highest leadership award given by the company and he will be sent to Aspire Walt Disney World for a Business Conference. He was one of thirty employees to receive this prestigious award. Congratulations, Roger!!!

Protecting Our Marriages

2012-02-08T04:00:00.000-08:00

Protecting Our Husbands From Other Women….

Ladies….Satan is real! None of us are exempt. The harder we work for God the more Satan will try to tear us down. What better way than to attack a minister’s home?

If Satan can break down the minister’s home---
---his family will hurt
---his church will hurt
---his friends will hurt
---the community will hurt.
---Really, there is no end to the hurt.

Every time I turn around, I hear of another minister’s home that has been split up because of adultery; either due to the guilt of the wife or the husband. It truly breaks my heart.

We all know that most of the time men are weaker in this area than women. We must love our husbands and protect them. How can you do that? I took notes a long time ago and would like to share them. Some of this came from the writings of S. Drury and some of it came from collections over the years. Regardless, I thought it held lots of important info and I would like to share them.

1) Understand your man! God made men and women different, especially sexually. You need to take the time to get to know your man to know what his needs and desires are. Men are triggered visually and physically. Get to know him well enough that you know how to light his fire, because if you don’t someone else with designs on him might be doing that this very week. His position, power, prestige and even his spiritual commitment makes him a special target for other women. They will use this to build his ego and leave room for Satan.

2) Share your radar alerts! Women have a sixth sense about other women. God gave us this early warning system to help us warn our husbands and not to be used to turn green with jealousy. Sit down and discuss your concerns with your husband BEFORE the concerns turn into jealousy. Just remind your husband...no matter "how spiritual" the female makes the conversation....if she is feeding his ego or if she is using him for communication because she is lonely....WATCH OUT. A woman that truly has a spiritual need and is truly wanting help will focus on that and NOT work on building the man's ego. I feel like that is why pastor are so vulnerable...they want to minister. And, there are women out there that know that and will use that and feed on that to build their egos and ZAP...Satan has them.

3) Keep the Fire Burning at Home. (I know many of us are embarrassed to discuss this because it is so personal….but we MUST protect our marriages and if it means pulling up our “big girl panties” and talking about subjects that are many times taboo, so be it.) Take care of yourself and take care of your husband. Be silly. Have fun. Flirt with him. Do something crazy and off the wall. Keep yourselves neat for him and and dress to please him sometimes. Just remember…if you do not take the time to feed his ego and entertain him physically, mentally and sexually, someone else will. Fight back and protect your marriage before it is too late. Remember, Satan is the enemy and he will use the weakest links to help him fulfill his missions.

4) Keep God First. Husbands and wives both need to have their quiet time and prayer time with God. But, also, couples need to pray together and grow in the Lord together. We must strive to stay as close as possible. When we are the closest to God, there is not space left for Satan. It only takes a fraction of an inch for the devil to weasel his way into our lives, so lets not give him that opportunity.

Father, I ask You to protect our marriages from the attacks of Satan. Deliver us from his evil, destructive plans. "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:" (1 Peter 5:8).

Ladies.....Let's Protect Our Marriages!!!

Update....

2012-02-07T06:28:00.000-08:00

Thanks for all of your prayers.....

Our son and daughter-in-law are married and living in an extended stay hotel in Hendersonville. They will be moving into an apartment the 18th. Today, they are celebrating their one month anniversary. Continue to remember them in your prayers as they settle into married life and seek out the "right" church. Especially remember our daughter-in-law....she has been VERY sick with a bad kidney infection for a week, and is slowing improving. Also she still has got to finish six weeks of Field Study for her Nutrition Major and will be living with her mom during that time. Remember our son as he learns his way around his new job assignment.

Continue to remember our daughter and son-in-law in your prayers as they are dealing with her "female problems". On top of that, they also have a VERY URGENT UNSPOKEN prayer request. They need folks from all over to pray earnestly on their behalf, especially this week when lots of decisions out of their control are being made that will directly affect them.

Pray for Roger and I as we pray and fuss over our married children.

Thank you in advance for lifting us up in your prayers!

Bi-Vo Conference

2012-02-06T06:09:00.000-08:00

WOW!!! What a weekend! Roger and I have just come back from our Annual Bi-Vocational Ministers and Wives Retreat in Pigeon Forge, TN. What an awesome and uplifting time we had.

Every year we say nothing can top this year, but every year (as our kids use to say…) it gets “doodier and doodier” and better and better.

We just spent three awesome days sitting under the guidance and teaching of Bro. Randy Davis, Bro. Bobby Welch, Bro. Willie McLaurin, Bro. Tony Rankin and last but DEFINITELY NOT LEAST…Sister JEANNE DAVIS. What an outstanding panel! You just can not get much better than that. They all blessed our hearts.

We were also blessed with the awesome singing of the “Voice of Mercy”, which consisted of three young ladies. They set the tone and got the spirit moving. You would have had to have been dead to not feel God’s spirt.

Our theme this year was “Navigating the Battlefield”. I feel as if we went to Pigeon Forge to be fitted for the armor and now we are ready to go out into the fields. AWESOME!!!

My husband and I came home Saturday night and yesterday at church we were both so refreshed and uplifted….it was amazing. My husband preached with new strength and energy and even our church members commented on.

I am sharing all of this to tell you….when retreats and conferences are offered to you….PLEASE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THESE OPPORTUNITIES. As pastors and wives, we all need to stop and refocus and this is the perfect time. Retreats and Conferences are a great time to learn, to re-fuel, to re-fresh and to get closer to God and to our spouses.

A VERY SPECIAL THANKS to Bro. Ray Gilder, Marjorie Waddey and Lana Rose for helping make this a special weekend for us. We love you!

Sunday Siesta - Practical Enduring

2012-02-05T17:44:00.000-08:00

I am curled up on the couch in my sweats and under my favorite throw. My husband has been marinating steaks that he braved the last-minute Super Bowl party shoppers to go out and purchase. My oldest entertained herself quietly in her bedroom all afternoon with her books and Nintendo DS. My youngest is still snoozing in her bed and I am deciding whether or not to stir her from her slumber. I do want her to go to bed at some point tonight.Our weekend has been a good one. The Dnow event was a success. God answered so many prayers. We were privileged to see Him move and to watch Him work.After church this morning, we pulled through the drive-through at Zaxby's and came straight home. After eating and slipping into our comfy clothes, I have NOT moved. I have slept, but I have not moved. There is laundry to be done, floors to be vacuumed and bathrooms to be scrubbed. It is not that I don't care, because I do. I am all too aware that these will be waiting for me come tomorrow. I really do like to start a busy week with a clean house and an empty laundry room. But not this week!I have found such value to our Sunday Siestas. Some Sundays a busier than others. Worship services and committee meetings make these naps hard to squeeze in, but my closest friends know better than to call. Whether it is ten minutes or two hours, it is so good to just be still. Physically, my body needs me to stop. Spiritually, I need the rest too. My hubby and I may not speak but it is so good to just be together. I never set out to form this habit, but God knew I needed it. After all, isn't that why He rested on the seventh day?Dear Sister, my sabbath rest truly helps me to endure. In the grand scheme of things it really is a minor thing, my Sunday afternoon nap. It isn't anything of great spiritual depth, but it is a little thing that does so much for me.What about you? What is it that you do to help you endure? Are there verses you cling to? Promises you claim? Friends who speak truth? I don't know what you may be enduring through right now. Maybe your seas are pretty smooth. Maybe you are wondering how Jesus can be sleeping in your boat as the storms seem to rage all around you. Regardless, don't be afraid to take your own Sunday Siesta. Be still. Take stock. Rest. Please feel free to post your own practical tips for "enduring." Only God knows. It may be just what another one of us needs to read.

Endure

2012-02-02T10:00:00.000-08:00

This weekend, many of our association churches are banding together to have a Disciple Now weekend for our students. They will be going through 5 sessions of a Bible Study entitled "Endure." It is based on Hebrews 12:2.

Hebrews 12:2

English Standard Version (ESV)

. . .looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

You may recognize it as the ending of the sentence begun in verse 1.

Hebrews 12:1

English Standard Version (ESV)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,

The second verse was chosen as the theme, because they wanted the emphasis to be on Christ.

The first verse we are all very familiar with. It graces the porcelain of countless mugs and plagues. It is a great verse full of great truth encouraging us in our Christian faith.

BUT . . .

It isn't supposed to stand by itself. The verse ends in a common, not a period.

The only way we can lay aside every weight and sin and run with endurance the race set out for us us, is if we look to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith. We can endure because He did.

Ladies, we can't do it on our own! We weren't designed to. We were created to need Him. We can endure whatever the race holds that He set before us if we are looking to Him.

I don't know what your "race" looks like right now. But, I know the One who set the course wants to help you run it. Whether it is sickness, barrenness, financial struggle, ministry heartbreak or a combination of stresses, despise the shame, and for the joy set before you, come before the throne of God. Jesus is seated at the right hand, making intercession for you.

Look to Him.

Endure.

Endure In Your Marriage

2012-01-31T19:18:00.000-08:00

The month of January has given me a new appreciation to what we ministers' wives face.

At the beginning of the month, I learned of a church in our association whose youth minister was being forced to resign due to his infidelity. He and his young wife had just welcomed their first child into the world mere weeks before.

In the last day, here at the end of the month, another church in our association is coping with the actions of another student minister's wife. She has moved out and filed for divorce catching him by total surprise.

Oh Ladies, my heart aches! One wife is trying to patch together her marriage by God given grace and His provided restoration. Another has decided to quit her marriage altogether.

One of these ladies I know and consider a friend. The other I don't know from Eve. I have reached out to the one I know, while all I can really do for the other is pray.

I know it is by God's grace alone that my story does not include their circumstances. I know that it is only by God's mercy that my sin nature, or my husband's, has not put us in a similar place. I know I must depend on Him alone to keep and protect my marriage.

Not knowing where each of you are in your marriage, let me encourage you to "endure." Keep your eyes on Jesus, who "endured" the cross, so you can run this race set before you with "endurance." You are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses that are urging you on.

Remember that your life and your marriage isn't about you or your husband. It isn't about his ministry or your image. It IS all about Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.

Endure through the tough times. Endure through the good times. Endure, not for the sake of your kids, or the church, but for Christ.

Endure in your marriage.

Texas, Tennessee, Indiana

2012-01-30T06:14:00.000-08:00

Saturday was my husband's birthday! To celebrate, we drove the few minutes it takes us to get to downtown Indianapolis and took in all of the Super Bowl activities! What a blast we had!! We actually even made the evening news!!

All 3 of the states we have lived in came together for his birthday celebration!! Texas, Tennessee and Indiana...and I thought I'd share a little bit with you!!

Tennessee--I HAD to get into this Tennessee Titan "body" for this picture!! Go Titans!! Super glad they did not have "bodies" of the cheerleaders!! Yikes! I for sure would NOT have had my picture in them!!

Indiana--Picture of the Lucas Stadium with Super Bowl and my precious husband!! It has been so much fun living in a town when super bowl is coming!!

Texas. Here is the amazing, easy, yummy recipe for the Texas sheet cake I made for his birthday cake. The reason I am sharing it with you is not only because it is our traditional family birthday go-to cake but because I saw a similar recipe not long ago that required lots of cooking and stirring and work!! THIS takes no time and is soooo easy and good!!

Texas Sheet Cake
2 sticks butter softened
4 Tbls cocoa
1 cup water
2 eggs
1/2 cup buttermilk (OR just use milk with about 1/2 Tblsp vinegar)
1 tsp soda
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp vanilla
2 cups sugar
2 cups flour

Mix and pour into large cookie sheet that has sides like a jelly roll pan (which I don't have) or a larger 9x13 pan (which I use but not sure of size!!) and bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes.

Icing--put on while hot (I make it while cake is baking and put on after it comes out. I even use the same bowl!)
1 stick butter softened
4 Tblsp cocoa
6 Tblsp milk (more or less depending on how you like it)
1/2 cup nuts (my family does not want nuts)
1 tsp vanilla
box powdered sugar (!!)

Mix and put on warm cake

Enjoy and Blessings to you!

January 25

2012-01-25T08:07:00.000-08:00

Today is my mom’s birthday. I would LOVE to go and celebrate her special day with a girl’s lunch out and a shopping spree like we might have when I was living at home. I would LOVE to drive several hours to spend time with her like I would have when we lived in the same state. I would LOVE to call her on the phone and sing happy birthday to her in a very off-key tune like I would have when we lived states apart. But, I can’t. My mom died five years ago.

I would LOVE to sit here and reminisce and recollect her life and my time with her without tears. These tears are more than missing her. They are deeper and full of much more anguish. These tears are because she is not celebrating her physical birth with Jesus. She rejected Him. It has never gotten any easier for me these past five years knowing her eternal existence…and as hard as it is for me…what about for her!!! Oh, my heart cannot bear it.

It is only by God’s grace that those of us who have lost unbelieving loved ones are able to face the Truth of the Gospel and of heaven and hell. I was so angry with God after she died—not because she was sick and died—we all are going to die! I was angry because she did not come to faith.

I will never forget the day when my anger was raging—that God spoke to me and said this, “Dana, I know you are angry. I understand it and know why. Now, you have a choice. You can continue to channel that anger toward Me OR you can channel that anger toward satan, who, by the way, is the author of sin and who caused all of this in the first place!”

I made a decision that day. I would stop being angry at God and channel all of that anger toward the enemy who is out to destroy those God has created. My desire is that everything I do is about defeating that enemy. I don’t want anyone else to suffer like my mom is. Like I am.

Tell or Not Tell?

2012-01-23T13:36:00.000-08:00

Do I tell or do I not tell? That is the question! As a minister’s wife, I have had several “ground rules” that I have typically adhered to over the years.

One ground rule is that I normally don’t automatically go and tell my husband stuff people tell me because I do not want to be the ‘go between’. I never want the people in our church to assume that if they want my husband to know something, but don’t want to tell him themselves, that they can tell me and I will tell him. If there is a life or death issue I break the rule—this is more for the people who want to complain or gripe or fuss about things that don’t matter but sometimes even for issues that deal with people or staff.

This ‘ground rule’ has served me well over the years. People soon learn that if they want my husband to know something….have concerns or “issues”, they need to talk to him not to me. I love to protect him that way.

Sometimes it has been super hard to keep quiet…other times it is quite easy!! Right now I am facing a dilemma. Something was shared (as a prayer request by the way!!) that I feel like my husband needs to know—but I don’t think I should be the one to tell him. Or should I?

First of all, it was a prayer request in a group that has a “ground rule” of what is said in group, stays in group. Secondly, I think they need to share their concern (it is a valid one) with my husband. BUT this is not the first time this concern has been brought to my attention.

Honestly, this has been on my heart and I have been praying about this for over a week—I want to “fix” this! I want to be a fixer!! I want to tell him….I want to tell them to tell him! BUT God keeps telling me to be quiet and pray! Pray and let Me handle it My way!!

Oh how freeing! To let God handle these “issues” His way without me getting in the mix and messing things up. Faith, Dana. Faith!!

Great! Good idea, God! That’s exactly what I will do. Say nothing to no one and pray!! So, pray I did. That is, until Sunday….I had a moment alone with one of the ladies with the concern and my big mouth busted out with, “will you please pray about telling Ernie about your concern? I think he needs to know.”

Grrrrr…..I so wanted to not say a word and let God handle this His way!! Forgive me Lord for thinking I can handle things and therefore miss out on seeing You do things that only You can do!!

So, what do you do? Do you always tell your husband the “stuff”?

Sassy Shoes Test

2012-01-21T09:39:00.000-08:00

I hate test! I despise true/false exams because you have a 50/50 chance of getting it right. I find fill in the blank test slightly easier, however, my mind often goes blank when trying to remember the answers. I absolutely loath math test. Give me a break! If I did not understand the problem in class when it was explained how can you expect me to pass the test? When math exam day rolled around, I was thankful Peanut M & Ms were there to calm my nerves.

Test! Do you realize that as a minister's wife we are tested daily? We are examined on how we care for our family. I once had a minister's wife who told me she was scolded because she shopped garage sales and Goodwill for their clothing. This family of five served a small church and their salary was a poverty level. We are also examined on how we conduct ourselves away from the church. Are you always smiling and gracious in public? I try but I fail a lot. We are tested on how well we cook. I fail this one for sure. How many of you have seen ladies staring at you or discussing your taste in clothing or hair style? I certainly have. However, I think I passed the clothing/accessory test recently. I wore a pair of sassy black and white heels to church and I received many compliments. Score one for me!

We are also tested daily by our Father on how much we trust Him. Many days I go it on my own. I trust only my abilities and fail miserably. On other days when I realize I am nothing on my own and give God control, I pass the test and learn a simple lesson. One big test most ministers families face is following God's leadership as He moves you to another church or ministry. If we do not follow God's leading, we may miss the blessing He has for us. Although passing the sassy shoes test was awesome, getting an A on God's test is indescribable.

Remember how God tested Abraham in Genesis 22 when He asked him to sacrifice Issac? Thankfully, Abraham passed the test and became the father of a mightly nation. What would have happened if he had failed to obey God? I shuttered to think of the consequences.

So girlfriends, are you passing your "sassy shoes" test?

Sacrifice

2012-01-17T09:02:00.000-08:00

I just received an email from a precious friend and former church member back in Tennessee. To know this lady is to know the true meaning of grace and trust on earth. What I love about her most is her sense of humor. Today her email simply stated that she was being sacrificial by eating more than her normal dose of chocolate. She is doing it in honor of me. My reply back was to say that I am on a diet-a chocolate diet. Well, cocoa comes from a bean and magnesium and other vitamins are found in chocolate. Makes perfect sense to me.

Seriously, my friend's comment about being sacrificial started my mind wondering. We all know the ultimate sacrifice was the death of our Lord and Savior. He did not have to die on the cross. He could have called down the angels of heaven to rescue Him but instead He willingly went through severe torture and death just for us.

But as a minister's wife, what does the word sacrifice mean. For each of us that word holds different meanings. I believe one of the toughest is willingly following God's call on our lives. My husband and I pour our lives in to our church family as if we will always be there. However, God has chosen to move us about every five to six years. For us that means leaving friends we love dearly and moving to a new ministry God has for us. Some of those friends we will see occassionaly but many we will never see again until God unites us in His kingdom.

Over the years of ministry I have had to give up several jobs that I loved in order to follow God's will for our lives. However, God has been faithful to put a new opportunity before me in our new location. For example, one job I held was working with juniors and seniors at a high school. I learned so much in the position and loved my kids. However, when God moved us I was able to take the skills I learned from my job and apply them to our church's youth group.

With our recent move I had to sacrifice a volunteer position I absolutely loved-working with ministers wives. I know God has something for me here and He will direct me in His plan. Currently, I am just trying to get to know my three staff wives who are precious ladies. I desire for God to make the four of us a tight knit group. Also, I pray He will open the door for me to meet other minister's wives in our association and state. I want to meet some crazy, wild, chocolate-loving ministers wives who love to have fun as much as I do.

Today I ask that you share your thoughts on this point: As a minister's wife what does sacrifice mean to me?

God Provides

2012-01-16T08:32:00.000-08:00

As many of you know by now, my husband and I moved during the Christmas holiday to a new place of ministry in Arkansas. Although this was a difficult move for us, God continues to confirm His call even today.

Right now we are living in temporary housing. One of the prayers on my list for this move was that God would provide a place for us because it would be impossible to afford rent and utilities here and a mortgage note and utilities back in Tennessee. God has been faithful to provide for our need, When a former church member from one of our previous churches found out about our move back to the Little Rock area, he called and offered a home his family had. It is fully furnished down to the pots and pans. Yep, God is faithful.

However, one thing is missing in this God provided house-our stuff. Oh, we brought a few things like clothes, a few kitchen and bath items, and a few family photos. But all of our material possessions are back in Nashville, TN being used to stage our home.

Now girlfriends, you all know that we need our things to make us feel settled. Girls, I do not even have my favorite blanket with me! However, a friend in Nashville created and gave us a beautiful afghan which is becoming my comfort. When I wrap myself in this afghan, warmth spreads over me. It is a constant reminder of God's love through friends. Hmm, God is still being faithful.

Even yesterday at church God, with his awesome sense of humor and care, provided for my chocolate need. One precious person baked a special chocolate bread and another individual brought a jar filled with my favorite nerve pills-Peanut M & Ms! Oh yes, God is faithful!

Matthew 6:8 states, ". . . your Father knows the things you need before you ask Him." This is a new place of ministry for us and we may not have all our material possessions with us, but the Father is providing for our every need.

In this new year how is God meeting your needs?

Time To Clean

2012-01-14T17:10:00.000-08:00

This past week I have been busy cleaning out clutter in my office. I did not realize that I had accumulated so much stuff, things that I really should have gotten rid of a long time ago. You know how it is; we desperately need to clean out, but put it off as long as we can. Since it is a new year, I decided to tackle the problem head on, without stopping until I got the job done. I had vowed that I would not procrastinate any longer. And you know what? It felt pretty good seeing my extra “clutter piles” slowly going away. . . it has actually been very therapeutic!

It is always good to take inventory of our homes, to clean up and clean out. But have you ever done a spiritual inventory? Have you ever asked the Lord if you need to “clean up” certain aspects of your life? Do you have “clutter” in your spirit that keeps you from drawing closer to God? “Clutter” in our spirits can show up in these very obvious places: our speech, our attitudes, and our actions.

Our Speech: Many times our words can get us into a whole lot of trouble. If we are not careful, a careless word spoken in haste, an unkind remark , or a destructive comment about another can have very damaging effects. Do we always think before we speak. Not always! James 1:19 tells us to be slow to speak. . . this verse has kept my mouth out of a lot of trouble!

Our Attitudes: A bad attitude can be seen in us when we are ungrateful, selfish, covetous, unkind, lazy, bitter, and in many more “not so pleasant” ways. All it takes is just looking at the life of Christ, and all that He endured on our behalf, to bring us to the realization that we need to get our attitudes in check. The wonderful passage on the humility and sacrifice of our Savior in Philippians 2:5-11 can give us a good wake-up call about our sometimes fleshy attitude, because it teaches that our “attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:5

Our Actions: Did you know that the way we act says a lot about what we believe or what influences us? Are our actions showing others that we truly belong to Christ or do they say we are being enticed by the world? When you think about it, where we go, what we watch, what we listen to, who we hang out with, all of these can be indicators of what we allow to shape our lives. Our actions should reflect that we are “. . doers of the word, not merely hearers. . .” . James 1:22

I could have expounded on each of these areas in greater detail, but for now, these are just some things to think about as we enter into a new year, a new beginning filled with hope and promise. So as we clean out the physical clutter in our homes, let us clean up the spiritual clutter in our hearts. Ladies, let’s not forget that when we belong to Christ, our bodies are temples of His Spirit, so let ’s make sure He resides in a clutter-free house!

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corinthians 5:17

Learning To Lean

2012-01-12T07:05:00.000-08:00

I mentioned in my blog earlier this week that we should learn to lean on Jesus. My dear friends I am so glad that the Lord does not leave us clueless about how we should go about laying all our cares at His feet, and not letting our sometimes hectic lives get the best of us. I want to share some Scripture passages that have been a blessing to me over the years; they have helped me to “lean” on the Lord:

1. Are you tired? All of us at times wear many hats. . .wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, care-giver, church member, and sometimes we wear multiple hats at the same time. Whew! How do we keep it all together without wanting to throw our hands up and declare, “Okay, Lord I just can’t take it anymore!” He has a wonderful invitation for us found in Matthew 11:28, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.”

2. Are you anxious? Anxious feelings can overcome you as you deal with circumstances surrounding your marriage (or no marriage prospects), a rebellious child, an aging parent, a dishonest co-worker, a disloyal friend, and ________________; you fill in the blank. Our glorious God gives us a remedy for our anxious hearts, “ Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” Philippians 4:6

3. Are you worried? Are there any frequent worriers out there? Everyone knows our economy has been in turmoil for quite a while now, so are you concerned about your long-term financial situation and how you will make ends meet? We serve a Heavenly Father that owns everything and He tells us how futile it is to worry. “And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life? So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:27,34 (The entire passage of Matthew 6:25-34 is great to read if you struggle with worrying.)

There are so many more verses that I could also share, but just know that as we fill our minds with God’s Word, we will see a huge change in the way we view life’s “stressors”. I know this to be very true because I have tried it, and it really works!!

Your testimonies also are my delight; they are my counselors. Psalm 119:24

Lean On Him

2012-01-09T11:04:00.000-08:00

Sometimes life can be very hectic, to say the least. No matter what season of life we are in, there are cares, concerns, and situations that demand our attention and drain us physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. There are issues with spouses, kids (small and not so small), grandchildren, aging parents, co-workers, friends. . . and the list goes on and on. How do we cope with all that life brings? Who do you turn to for help?

As I was reading recently in John’s gospel in chapter 13 (the account of Jesus washing His disciples feet and sharing with them one last meal), I noticed the posture of one of the disciples in verse 23 . I found myself meditating on this verse and what this disciple’s body language conveyed. The disciple is none other than John, the one who never mentions his own name, but refers to himself as the disciple whom Jesus loved. John is “leaning on the bosom of Jesus”; we can learn something from his position. John was resting and relaxing, having no idea of what was about to happen. His beloved Jesus was about to face the agony of the Cross, but John seemed so calm, simply leaning on his Savior. Perhaps he did not fully comprehend the magnitude of all that the Lord would face, but his posture indicates that he was content with just being in the Lord’s presence, not having a care in the world.

I have actually pictured myself resting in my Savior’s arms, especially when I am tired and weary or anxious and afraid. The thought of Him holding me is so comforting and calming. The mental picture that the Holy Spirit puts into my heart and mind brings me such a sense of peace, and I too am content with just being in His presence. What about you? Have you ever pictured yourself resting in the Lord’s arms?

Ladies, are you facing some monumental situation in 2012? Is there a concern that seems to grip you with worry and fear? Take a good look at the posture of John and then “lean” on our compassionate, loving Savior. He is always willing to comfort us and give us His peace. We cannot change our circumstances, but we can draw close to Christ and allow Him to soothe our weary hearts. We can also find comfort in the words He gave to His disciples in that upper room, and they are calming words for us now, “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.” John 14:27

Whatever happens in 2012, let us learn to lean!

On the Seventh Day of 2012....

2012-01-07T14:00:00.000-08:00

TODAY...is the WEDDING - January 7, 2012 @ 2:00 p.m. EST.

Melanie Leighann Rollins and Cody Allen Britton will be united in marriage. Cody's dad will be marrying them. Please remember this young couple in your prayers as they begin their journey together. Pray for their safety on their honeymoon and pray for a healthy, spirit-led long marriage.

"Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate." Mark 10:9

We feel so blessed. God sent great Christian mates to both of our children. Chase & Kacie and Cody & Melanie have already been a blessing to us and we are excited to spend many more years with our FOUR CHILDREN. (And yes, Cody and Melanie do look young, but they are 22 and 23, so still young, but not near as young as they look. Smile.)

Also...I have a confession.....
I am REALLY not here today....
Thank Goodness I figured out how to schedule these blogs ahead of time or you would NOT have heard from me today....I have been a wee bit occupied. See you in a few weeks and hopefully by then things will have settled down.

Pain in the Midst of the Joy

2012-01-05T08:38:00.000-08:00

Breath...Just Breath. The wedding is in two days!!!

We are excited and joyful for our son and future daughter-in-law.....but in the midst of the joy, we are in pain. Our daughter is having some medical issues with fertility and needs your urgent prayers. I know that with God NOTHING is impossible........just pray that we can all, especially our daughter and son-in-law can keep our FAITH and keep focusing on that and NOT GIVE UP.

We just covet your urgent prayers right now. They are hurting so therefore we hurt. Pray for the wedding (for NO RAIN) and Cody and Melanie's upcoming journey into marriage. This is an exciting time for them and we are so very happy for them.

Also pray for the pain Kacie and Chase are experiencing.

Pain in the Midst of the Joy......we NEED your PRAYERS!

On the Fourth Day of 2012...

2012-01-04T05:00:00.000-08:00

WHEW…… The New Year has just started and I am exhausted. Sunday, after church we drove to Grand Rivers, KY ( 5 hours from our home) to see our son and bring a load of things back to Dayton.

He is getting married this Saturday and next week when he is on his honeymoon, it will be his last week in Kentucky. After the honeymoon, they will move near Nashville, where he will be working at Old Hickory Lake. Therefore, we still have not caught our breaths from the holidays and now we are trying to help him make sure that the things he NEEDS for the wedding and honeymoon are in Dayton and also the things he will need for the first few weeks of their marriage and work are separate from the things that will be put in storage until they get settled. Therefore he is getting work outfits ready, honeymoon things ready, wedding things ready and packing to move.

We are at the end of WEDDING COUNT DOWN:
REHEARSAL.
DINNER.
WEDDING.

My husband is marrying them in our church, so we have taken on more responsibility than normal, but it has been fun to be included.

I think our clothes are ready. Menu is made and items purchased. Center pieces made. Hot Chocolate Mix made for wedding. Groom’s cake ordered. Lots of Help lined up. Everything needed ordered or purchased. Now…I just need some CHOCOLATE. The bride’s mom said that Saturday after the wedding we are going to pig out on chocolate until we barf. (Not sure we will go THAT far, but who knows….)

I am a teacher, so I went back to school today and will work tomorrow, BUT…I took off work Friday and Monday.

I am sorry that this blog is so jumbled…maybe it is because I feel all jumbled about right now.

God Bless You for bearing with me. Ya'll are Awesome!

On the Second Day of New Years.....

2012-01-02T05:00:00.000-08:00

Today, reflecting on this past year, I am reminded of what Gloria Gaither once said…”The amazing thing about Jesus is that He doesn’t just patch up our lives, He gives us a brand new sheet, a clean slate to start over, all new.” I am pretty sure that she was referring to salvation, but isn’t this true in our everyday life?

Thinking of 2011…if I had it to do over, some things I would have done differently and others I would do the same.

Beginning yesterday…2012, I got a clean sheet of paper and got to start over. The past is in the Past and today is a new day. All of those forgotten resolutions are no longer and I get to create new ones. Smile.

Seriously looking back to my last year’s resolutions......
*Eating Healthy
*Exercising More
*Not Sweating the Small Stuff
*Spend More Quality Time with God
*Keep in Touch with Family & Friends More
*Keep a Positive Attitude.

I can say that I did change my eating habits. I need to change them some more, but just by making wiser choices when eating, I was able to slowing whittle 30+ lbs. from my frame last year. I must confess that I got slack and for several months have only maintained and not lost. BUT…as soon as the wedding is over, I am back to hard core making better choices.

I really need to add exercise this year....I did not do very well with THAT last year. I have tried to keep a more positive attitude which has helped me to not sweat the small stuff as much, but I still need to work on it. I did manage to keep in better touch with folks and I can never spend enough quality time with God.

I think I will not add anything new this year, but continue to work on last year’s plan. Today is a new day, so who knows....

May you have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! I expect to hear GREAT things from you in 2012.

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!

2012-01-01T01:00:00.000-08:00

New Year's Peace

2011-12-31T09:50:00.000-08:00

Tonight is the big night, the last night of 2011 and the dawn of 2012. Facebook is full of New Year's wishes and promises that the next year will be even better than the last.

No doubt you have given at least a thought or two about the new year, what you want to do differently, what you want to be better about, an old habit that you desire to abandon. Maybe you even have some great God-centered resolutions for the new year, to read your Bible through, to begin a new study, to be more missions minded.

The truth is, we have no control over anything in the new year. We don't know what 2012 holds for us. We can't dictate what will happen and we really can't even predict how we will respond to whatever 2012 holds. We never focus on the negative of what could happen, we just assume it is all good.

Even those things we think we can control- our attitudes and actions, are subject to a power beyond ourselves. John 15:5 is very clear, apart of Christ we can do nothing, no thing, nothing.

Personally, I have great peace that in the new year that God will supply all my needs in His riches through Christ. I have great peace in the truth that He will equip me to do whatever He may ask me to do in 2012. I have great peace that God is God, sovereign in all and over all. I have great peace as I submit my plans to His.

He is already in 2012. He has control over whatever He already knows will happen. He is prepared to help us handle whatever He has ordained for us in 2012.

We can trust our good God. We can face the new year in His perfect peace.

End Of Year Peace

2011-12-30T07:26:00.000-08:00

The morning news shows are all wrapping up the week with year-end reviews of trends and news stories that define 2011. People use this time of year to reflect on the happenings and the lessons of the past 12 months. There is more than just a nostalgia about this time of remembering. The introspection can be educational and therapeutic. After all, didn't someone smart and famous say that if we do not learn from the past then we are destined to repeat it?

I have been so busy this fall and into the holiday season I had not had much time for this kind of thinking. Then someone close to me pointed out that my year had been really hard. I hadn't thought of it that way. I guess the puzzled look across my face gave my thoughts away and she began to recount some of the events of the last year.

Even now I could list the trials that God ordained for my life in 2011, but my motivation would not be to lament over the year's difficulties, but rather to praise my Savior for bringing me through each one. I want to look back and see Him glorified, not me as some martyr who survived.

The truth is that I do not have to look far to find someone who has been brought through so much worse. Actually, I am blessed to see many of my trials finished, while there are others still bearing harder, heavier burdens.

My year-end peace is not in the completion of a "hard" year or the resolution to some hard times. My peace is in the One who orchestrated each step of the journey I can label 2011. My peace is in the fact that this year, this life isn't at all about me.

Yes, I will spend some time looking back this weekend, but it won't be about my year -what I did or didn't do. I want to spend the time reflecting about what God has done this year. I want to rest in the peace that He has been intimately involved in my life and the truth that He isn't finished with me yet.

Please feel free to post a reflection on how God has shown Himself to you in 2011.

Post Christmas Peace

2011-12-29T21:20:00.000-08:00

Oh Wow!

I wish you could see my house right now. Talk about transparency! It is 11:00 at night and we have just returned from our final Christmas celebration with my Ohio family. The carnage is everywhere. There is not a room untouched by the wreckage that was our celebrating, packing and returning.

The living room has piles of clean laundry waiting to be put away. The hall is piled with opened gifts awaiting a new home. There is still a pile of empty action figure wrappings in the den beside an obviously played with dollhouse. The dishes in the dishwasher are clean, but there remains a pile to take their place once the clean ones have vacated the machine.

I checked. I have 48 unread, unanswered emails. There are work issues that wouldn't go away over the holiday. I did buy some things for better organization in the new year, but there is a big difference between having them bought and having put them to use. And I am two days behind in my Bible reading plan.

The girls fell asleep in the car and easily made the transition to pajamas and bed. Wally is resting his weary, interstate blurred eyes. The house is a wreck, but wonderfully quiet. Despite the turmoil and upheaval all around me. There is peace.

This peace is more than my babies sleeping or the lack of noise. It is obviously not from a completed to-do list and an orderly, well-put-together house. Yes, there are all kinds of church political issues and sticky situations, so it isn't about the perfect ministry position. Those things would all be nice, but this peace is not found in any of those wonderful things.

I am at peace with my Creator. The God of the Universe and I are on good terms. His Son has made it so.

The important things are in order. There is peace.

Now, I am going to bed! Night!

Inspiration

2011-12-23T13:10:00.000-08:00

What inspires you? Exhilarates you? Motivates you? Invigorates you? A fun shopping spree? Eating yummy food? Hanging out with friends? A long nap? A good book? A funny movie? A good workout?

Who inspires, exhilarates, motivates, invigorates you? A good friend? Your sister? Husband? Children? Famous movie star or celebrity? Godly mentor? Biblical teacher or speaker?

Where do you go to for inspiration?

I am working at Pier 1 Imports and so many people come into the store saying “I am looking for some inspiration” or “I need to be inspired”. I know what they meant…for sure they were not looking for spiritual inspiration….they were looking for ideas for decorating their Christmas tree or setting their tables or their Christmas gift-giving. However, every time I hear a customer say they want “inspiration” I could not help pondering the thought of people everywhere craving inspiration.

What we all need is not just inspiration but Godly inspiration. Unfortunately, I often find that instead of looking to be inspired by God and His Word….I look everywhere else for that inspiration.

AND…..since we are on the topic of inspiring…..Who do you inspire? Who do I inspire? Do we realize and/or remember that there are people all over the place looking and needing to be inspired? Oh, how I want to be one who inspires! One who inspires others for godliness.

Lord, I long to be inspired by You and for You. May Your Word be our inspiration and may we use Your Word to inspire others. You are Emanuel, God with us!!

Monkey Bread

2011-12-20T06:26:00.000-08:00

If you could see me now!! I am propped up in the bed….under covers with pillows behind me. Notebook, pen, recipe cards, books, magazines, coupons and lists all around me. What to make this week? What to eat? Cook? Decisions, decisions!!

There is one decision I for sure do NOT have to make—we are having Monkey Bread (see recipe below) Christmas morning!! It is a tradition! We always have Monkey Bread for Christmas!! Even when we were in a third world country last Christmas we figured out a way to have Monkey Bread even without a normal oven and dishes and ingredients!!

I wonder….if our family had Monkey Bread more often…..say every week or month…..would we love it as much? Would we grow tired of it? Not anticipate it? Not be excited about it? If it became a daily or weekly or monthly fare would we become ho-hum about it?

This got me thinking….thank God that we can eat of the Bread of Life daily, hourly and never grow tired of it! Or do we? We can sit at His banquet table and feast and never grow weary of it. Or can we?

Thank God that His mercies are new every day!! Every day!! We will never get tired of new things about Him!! Or do we? Perhaps that is why the persecuted church is thriving? They would LOVE to be able to “eat” whenever they wanted to….where the American Church takes it for granted?

Let’s take a quick evaluation and see if we are guilty of becoming “used” to the menu, or think we are “full” enough or just tired of it and seek His forgiveness! Then EAT!! Feast on His Word!

Here’s the recipe for Monkey Bread!
4 cans biscuits, quartered—regular kind, not flaky, etc.
2 sticks butter, melted
2 tsp cinnamon
1 ½ cup brown sugar
Mixture of cinnamon and sugar--to taste--maybe a tsp of cinnamon 1 or 1/2 cup sugar

Grease Bundt pan (or spray with Pam). Preheat oven to 325. Cut can of biscuits into quarters. Shake in zip lock bag with cinnamon sugar mixture to coat. Continue with other cans of biscuits. Put biscuits into Bundt pan. Mix butter, cinnamon and brown sugar. Pour over biscuits. Bake 35 to 45 minutes. Remove from oven and let sit for a few minutes. Turn over on to dish and serve warm! Yummy!

Christmas

2011-12-17T14:21:00.000-08:00

Well, I am still doing some packing in preparation for moving. Yesterday was just an awful day. My husband and I decided to walk through each room and make sure we had "depersonalized" it. Then, we started trying to decide what items we would need to take with us for the next few weeks. I admit up front I was not a happy person and did a little crying. Everytime I walked by the kitchen I grabbed a handful of chocolate. Seriously, this is Christmas and my house should be decorated. I should be preparing for friends and family. Instead, I am preparing to move.

Christmas is my favorite time of the year. I love decorating and choosing gifts for people. I love the parties and having family and friends into our home. However, this year our house depersonalized and honestly, a little depressing.

However, one precious thing happened. My husband portrayed Joseph last week at our church's Parent Night Out. I decided to stop "decluttering" and packing and go with him. Seeing the children laughing and their excitement helped my spirits. Before we left, the children made a presentation to us-a handcrafted Christmas tree of their handprints on posterboard.

Girlfriends, this Christmas tree proudly sits in the corner of our house. It reminds me that Christmas is not about the parties and gifts. It is about the birth of our Savior and Lord who personally thought of us on that first Christmas Day.

Merry Christmas to all of you!

2011-12-14T09:47:00.000-08:00

As I mentioned the other day in my post, God is moving us to a new church back in Arkansas. We just returned last night from setting up his new office and checking out our temporary housing. Two things I already know: my husband has too many books and even though I know the Little Rock area, I will get lost trying to find the house where we will be living for a while. I think I am just going to check with my doctor to see if they have a chocolate IV available.

Speaking of chocolate . . . I had so much fun last week. Lana, at the TBC, provided a chocolate brunch for me. It was so special to see some of you. As I said I do not like goodbyes but this time allowed me to have some closure to my time in Tennessee. Girlfriends, you will never know how much you mean to me.

Anyway, I want to keep on the subject of moving. The packing of material possessions and getting paperwork in order can be so stressful. Personally, I have so much to do to get ready for our house to be staged and up on the market. Thankfully, it is just the two of us now, but at one time we also had to deal with our two sons and their emotional needs during a move.

If you do have children, you know that change can be difficult. You need to keep a schedule of some kind. You have to prepare their little hearts for the big move. I am no expert on the subject children or moving but I can share some tips I learned over the years.

*Depending on your children's ages, talk to them. Let them be part of the discussion and allow them to pray with you about the move.
*Let them know it is okay to be sad. My boys saw me cry with each move and sometimes we all cried together.
*Show excitement about the "new" journey ahead. If possible make a trip ahead of time to just look at new area. Find things that will be fun to explore like parks, zoos, etc. For instance, one small town we lived in had a local wildlife zoo, a nature walk, and huge children's playground.
*If possible when visiting the church, let your children meet kids their age. When our boys were in second and fifth grades, we were able to go to one weekend to a church we were in the early stage of talking with. A wonderful man in the church set up a pizza party for my boys and invited boys from the church to come too. When we were leaving town, my oldest son said, "Even if we do not move here, I have new friends in my life." (We did move to this church and on the first day, my boys were off running around with their new friends).
*If your children are small, read them Berestein Bears Moving Day.
*If you are having to sell a house and live in temporary housing, allow your children to select some of their favorite items to pack in a special box to carry with them. Even parents may want to do the same. As I said we will be living in furnished temporary housing and really do not need to take anything with us. However, I am packing a few of a favorite books, photos, pictures, and blanket because I need those items to help me feel more settled.
*If you are going straight to a new house or parsonage, allow your children to walk through the home and show them where their rooms will be. Create excitement by allowing your child to suggest where they would like to put their bed and toys.

As I said these suggestion are what worked for us over the years. My sons are now married adults and function fairly normal (considering who their mom is). If you have children and have moved from one church to another, maybe you have some suggestions that might help some of our cyber sisters. Please take time to share them by leaving a comment.

That Four Letter Word

2011-12-12T12:28:00.000-08:00

I'm homeless at the moment. Well, maybe I am not literally homeless. Okay, I am in transition. In other words, God has called my husband and I to a new ministry back in Arkansas. Yep girlfriends, I am experiencing that four letter word that every minister's wife has a love/hate relationship with-MOVE.

When that four letter word was first uttered early in the fall, my first reaction was to tell God and my husband "absolutely not!" We were slowing getting our house refloored, my parents were not well, and I just did not want to move again. However, over the next few months, God worked on my heart and started revealing that this move was part of His plan for us.

Girlfriends, moving is a tough experience. No amount of chocolate in the world can soothe the heartbreak of leaving people who become your "family". When you see congregations through births, baptisms, a natural disaster, and deaths, you become connected. However, I do not want to end this post on a down note. As much as I hate that four letter word, a move can be an exciting time as well.

First, a move is God's way of stretching your faith. When the pulpit committee makes first contact, you really have to listen to what God is saying. You have to put aside your own selfishness and seek His desires.  In other words, a move draws you closer to the Father.

Second, a move opens doors to a new part of your ministry. Think back on some of your own moves. Can you connect the dots of how a move opened a doorway to a new path that you might have missed if you did not follow God's will? For example, if I had not moved to Nashville, I would never have met Lana Rose at the state convention office, been able to work on some of the ministry teams through the state convention, or be honored to be a Prime Rib blogger.  I would have never met many of you across the state who are chocoholics like me! Oh, my life would be so empty if God had not moved us to Tennesee.

Third (and don't laugh), a move allows you to clear out the junk. It is the one time when we go through closets, drawers, boxes, shelves, the garage and dejunk. Goodwill, Salvation Army, and the garbage collector become our best friends during the moving process.

So you see, girlfriends, a move does not always have to be a dreaded four lettered word.  We do not have to like it but we should welcome it. Besides, Christians never really should say goodbye because this is just our temporary home.

There's Something About That Name

2011-12-09T11:25:00.000-08:00

One of the joys of expecting a newborn baby is the fun we have in choosing just the right name to call our bundle of love. It’s always interesting to see what the “Top Ten” boy and girl names are for any given year. Popular baby names come and go; one year a certain name may be well liked by moms and dads, and the next year it may at the bottom of the list.

I remember when my husband and I were trying to decide on names for our girls. We named our oldest daughter Ashley; I had always loved that name, which incidentally means “meadow”. Our youngest daughter we named Arianna, which means “very holy one”. At that time, I never really researched what their names meant, we just knew what we wanted to call our little princesses.

While it was insignificant to us what our children’s names meant, the many names of Jesus have great significance. During this season of advent, we often reflect on some of the names of our Savior, and what glorious names they are. In Isaiah 7:14, He is referred to as "Immanuel", which means “God is with us”. Wow! God did come to be with us, born as a tiny baby to Mary and Joseph. And God is still with us in the presence of the Holy Spirit who lives inside of our hearts.

I love the roll call of awesome names in Isaiah 9:6. He is a “Wonderful Counselor” who counsels and comforts our souls. He is a “Mighty God” who is pictured as being strong, victorious, and sovereign over all. He is the “Everlasting Father” who is and was and is to come, the eternal One who has no end or beginning. He is the “Prince of Peace” who is the only One who gives us perfect peace when we draw near to Him. It brings me great joy to know that He embodies all these attributes and so many more!

Bill and Gloria Gaither wrote a song a few years ago titled “There’s Something About That Name”; it is a beautiful song expressing the reverence, yet loveliness of the name of Jesus. Ladies, as we think about the birth of Christ during this time of year, take some time to reflect on some of His names in the Scriptures, and just worship Him for all that He is.

YES, . . .There Is Something About That Name!

“She will bear a Son; and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins.” Matthew 1:21

A Special Night

2011-12-07T09:20:00.000-08:00

Have you ever imagined what it must have been like, the night that our Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ was born? In that small, smelly little stable in Bethlehem some 2000 years ago, the world’s greatest birth took place. The King of all Creation made His entrance into this dark, sin-cursed world, fulfilling the prophecy of Micah who said, “But you Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times.” (Micah 5:2)

To a humble clan of shepherds watching over their sheep that night, it may have started out like any ordinary night. Little did they know that they were about to receive some news that would literally change the world. An angel from heaven appeared to them in the still, dark sky and the glory of God surrounded them as the angel proclaimed, “I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord.” (Luke 2:10-11)

Yes, on that glorious night we received our precious Savior who had come to save us, to redeem us, to bring us back to God! What a night that must have been, and perhaps before the shepherds could fully process what was being said to them , the angel was joined by a great company of angels who praised and gave glory to the Lord saying, “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom His favor rests.” (Luke 2:13-14)

There have been many wonderful hymns written about that night, such as “Silent Night”, “O Holy Night”, “Hark the Herald Angels Sing”, and “It Came Upon the Midnight Clear”. All of these classic songs pay tribute to a night that was like no other. Have you ever stopped to think about the night that Jesus was born? Have you pondered what it must have been like, and how you would have felt if you were one of the shepherds receiving the glorious news?

During this Christmas season, maybe you might like to read the account of Jesus’ birth in Luke Chapter 2, and then close your eyes and imagine that you were there. As you meditate on this passage, may the Holy Spirit give you a new found joy and appreciation for that most sacred night when God manifested His love to us by sending His only begotten Son.

"And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent His Son to be the Savior of the world."
1 John 4:14

Lord, What Am I Suppose To Do?

2011-12-05T15:23:00.000-08:00

This is for all you dear precious ladies who are new to the role of minister’s/pastor’s wife.........

I remember those early days fourteen years ago when my husband was first called to be a minister. I remember feeling excited for him; now that I was a minister’s wife I wondered, “Lord, what am I suppose to do?” It was a new world for both of us, but the one thing I did know at that time was that no matter what, I would be a support for my husband as he did the work of the Lord.

As I mentioned in my introductory blog a few weeks ago, before my husband was called to be a senior pastor, he served as a minister in another church for seven years. He had various duties that he performed, and he became a leader in several capacities. I remember assisting with baptisms and helping to prepare for communion, but I had no “formal” duties. Yet during those years I began to spend more time in God’s Word, participating in Bible studies, and striving to grow as a Christian.

When my husband was called to be a senior pastor at a different church, I was excited then too, but still feeling to an even greater degree, “Lord, what am I suppose to do?” Now that I was a pastor’s wife, I wondered if I should get involved in as many church activities as possible and do all I could to be a “good pastor’s wife”. That would have been a formula for becoming burned out very quickly. Thankfully, a seasoned pastor gave me some advice a few months after I began my journey in this role. He told me to allow the Holy Spirit to lead and guide me regarding which ministries to participate in, because no one can do it all. That wise counsel has been a blessing to me ever since. Over these last seven years I have prayed and ask the Lord to lead me where He wants me to serve. It’s amazing to see that as we are lead by Him, He shows us that some things we do for a season, and some things may be life-long commitments.

If you are a student of the Word, you probably already know that the Scriptures are silent when it comes to spelling out the duties of a minister’s/pastor’s wife. So my dear friends who are new to the ministry, allow the Holy Spirit to be your counselor and let him show you where you are to serve Him and His people. In my blog in November titled “Can We Talk About Gifts”, I expounded on spiritual gifts; serve based on how He has gifted you. Then you will not have to wonder. . ."Lord, what am I suppose to do?” The Holy Spirit will show you where to go to work.

“For it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure.” Philippians 2:13

Pouring Rain

2011-12-02T05:25:00.000-08:00

What a week! When it rains it pours……literally!!! Sunday morning I got up to take a shower and there was no hot water and four people in the house had to take showers to go to church. We all took lukewarm showers and survived.

Our church is 32 miles from church so usually on Sundays we stay at church and do not come home. That was the case this Sunday also. Later that night as we were driving home, we were dreading having to deal with no hot water.

We got home and found our bathroom wet. Apparently there was a leak in the roof and water was dripping from the ceiling. I might also mention that a couple of weeks ago, we were having drain problems, so my husband went under the floor to fix it and discovered that our spare bathroom had had a leak and had major problems. To make a long story short, all of the flooring and the sheet rock had to be torn out and everything totally re-done. The spare bathroom is about half-way finished since Roger and our neighbor are working on it at night, after work. That being said, this meant that BOTH bathrooms had issues.

On top of all of that, my husband has a history of kidney stones that usually do not pass on their own without the aide of some type of surgery. His kidney has been hurting since Sunday.

The ceiling probably decided to leak because it is FLOODING in East Tennessee. The rain began Sunday and by Monday, the schools were let out early because the creeks had risen. (Also, let it be noted that once again I took a not-so-fun COLD SHOWER.)

We have Christmas in a few weeks and the wedding a couple of weeks after that and it is CRAZY at the Britton House. All I could do was just sit down and laugh. Welcome to our world! I know that God has a sense of humor and sometimes I think he loves putting us on the end of the yo-yo and watching us go up and down just to see how we handle it all. Smile.

Praise the Lord….my husband called Whirlpool and they were able to talk him through it and I had hot water by the time I got home on Monday. I left Wednesday morning to go to Nashville for a Technology Conference and will return today (Friday) hopefully the spare bathroom will be finished when I return.

Like I said at the beginning of this blog...when it rains, it pours...LITERALLY.

And you thought you had problems!!! Smile. Seriously, all of these things are JUST THAT…THINGS and FIXABLE THINGS at that. We still have so many blessings and praises. It could have been a lot worse. It’s easy to praise God on the Mountain Top….but what we need to strive to do is praise God in the Valley.

Holidays!

2011-12-01T05:00:00.000-08:00

BLESSINGS

2011-11-29T05:00:00.000-08:00

I know that last week was Thanksgiving, but like always, I am a day late and a dollar short. Smile. These are some of the things I am thankful for this year…and in no particular order.

I AM THANKFUL FOR….

1. Salvation. No one can take that away from me, even though many times I do not deserve it.
2. A husband that loves God, loves me and loves our children. Who cares if he starts MANY projects and finishes few? At least he is doing something. Smile. He is first a Godly man, and he has stood by my side and loved me for 39 years counting the time we dated and my children could not ask for a better dad.
3. Two children that love God. And I thank God every day for them and feel so unworthy of having such smart, good children.
4. Godly mates for my children. I appreciate our son-in-law and also our very soon to be daughter-in-law. God has chosen awesome mates for them.
5. A friendly, loving church to serve. Sometimes it takes listening to other pastors and wives for me to really appreciate what we have. Sure…we are not perfect, but then again, if our church WAS perfect, they would not want us serving there. Smile.
6. A roof over my head and food to eat. Sometimes I take things for granted and am not thankful enough. I may not live in a house that was built this year and I may not eat Prime Rib and Lobster every night…but I am well taken care of.
7. Good Health. This is another thing that we tend to take for granted until it hits home. Everywhere I look, families are being visited by cancer, diseases, etc. Everyday I am more and more thankful for my good health. I had a student last year that is still battling melanoma cancer and we have a 6th grade student this year that has just completed her months of chemo for a rare kidney cancer.
8. Friends and Family. They are the glue that keeps me together. You are the ones that love and accept me regardless of my down-falls.
9. The Tennessee Bi-Vo Ministry. We have made friends that we have grown very close to….and the Conference each year is like the BOOSTER SHOT we need to carry through. We learn so many things, cry together, laugh together and really enjoy our fellowship. And, yes, Lana always makes sure there is CHOCOLATE.
10. All of You Ladies that read this. You keep me motivated. Being a pastor’s wife can be a lonely job and reading your blogs and the comments that other pastor’s wives and ladies write makes me realize that I am not alone….as Sandi Patti said…”We’re In This Thing Together…..just Jesus and Me….and all of my “support ladies”. Thank you very much.

I have so many things to be thankful for and many times I dwell on the little picture and on “stuff” that does not matter and I forget to look at the “big picture” and see what really matters.

Thanks you, God, for all of my blessings!!! May I never get too “busy” to be thankful.

Planning

2011-11-28T05:00:00.000-08:00

The wedding is 40 days from today. Wow….a lot of things to do between now and then….Christmas with Lots of Family, New Years, and the WEDDING.

I have discovered that being the mother-of-the-groom is different from being the mother-of-the-bride. The wedding is being held at our church so I still feel a wee bit responsible probably more than I should. As mother-of-the-bride, you have a voice, or at least you think you have a voice. As mother-of-the-groom, you know you have no voice. BUT…I will have to confess, the mother-of-the-bride and the bride are including me in many, many things that they are not obligated to do.

My daughter told me that the mother-of-the-bride has no voice either; I just thought they did. I well remember four and a half years ago, making lots of suggestions that were thrown to the side....so that should have been my clue.

The BRIDE is actually the one with all of the VOICE. It is HER DAY. It is just our jobs to see that her wishes are made true.

Four and a half years ago, I watched our daughter preparing for her BIG DAY. Early in the planning I realized that I had had “my day” and this was hers. I was use to the traditional weddings that existed thirty-two years ago. I soon discovered that there is no such thing as “traditional” anymore. Every bride adds her own personality to the planning which makes everything more unique and personal.

It is fun watching our son and daughter-in-law-to-be as they plan for THEIR DAY….and seeing their unique personalities blossom. So much careful planning….and so many details……

I have enjoyed watching our daughter and her husband mature and grow in the Lord. I am looking forward to seeing what God has in store for our son and his new bride.

Isn’t it exciting to be involved in the planning of the wedding and marriage or our children? Just think how disappointed you would be if your children decided to exclude you from their "excitement" and plans.

Can you just imagine how excited God gets when we allow him to be involved in the planning and preparing for our every day activities? Let's not disappoint Him, let’s honor Him by including him in even the smallest details.....because he wants ALL of us and not "part of us".

Black Friday & Advent

2011-11-25T08:57:00.001-08:00

Well Ladies, I imagine that many of you are braver than I am. I slept in this morning and I am still sipping some flavored coffee, sitting in p.j.'s as I type. I was not about to venture out this morning into the maze and daze of holiday shopping and bargain hunting. Don't get me wrong, I am for the deal as much as the next gal, but I am a big wimp when it comes to long lines and pushing elbows.

I am sure I could do a little research and discover how this day got tagged "Black Friday." But, honestly, when I think about black Fridays, my mind goes to how the disciples and followers of Christ must have felt on the Friday we all call "Good." That was a dark, black day indeed as our dear Savior, Son of the Living God, died the most brutal of possible deaths. We have the perspective and the luxury of knowing that Sunday was coming. They did not.

It is kinda of fitting that our Advent season begins on the Sunday following Black Friday this year. The first week of Advent begins the day after tomorrow, just as Easter Sunday follows Good Friday.

In our home, we celebrate Advent by having a family devotional around an Advent wreath on the living room table. Our oldest, Riley, dubbed the ten or so minutes spent in a brief study and praise, "Candlelight Christmas." When asked she will say that this time is one of her most favorite parts of the Christmas season.

Wally, my husband, finds a different plan to follow each year. A simple Internet search of "Advent Devotionals" will yield an over abundance of results. He takes what he likes best from one or two and tailor fits it to our girls' ages and learning styles. This year, his main focus is from The Village Church out of TX. (http://www.thevillagechurch.net/the-village-blog/advent-at-the-village/)

I am all about taking the world's views and plans and finding God's purposes in them. Let me challenge you to use this Black Friday as an opportunity to begin to prepare your hearts for the celebration of the coming birth of our Lord.

Does your family do something special or unique to celebrate the Sundays of Advent, the four Sundays leading up to Christmas? We are always looking for new ideas to enrich our "Candlelight Christmas." Please post your Advent traditions. It may just be the missing component to help another family keep their focus on Christ this Christmas.

Jesus in Turkey Day

2011-11-22T18:37:00.001-08:00

"Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”

Luke 17:17-18

I think it is interesting that no one really sees Thanksgiving as a religious holiday anymore. No matter what faith a person seems to possess, no one seems to have an issue with celebrating the day. (Except maybe the turkeys!) Everyone seems to agree that we should be thankful. The question becomes this: just who is everyone thanking?

Mothers and fathers have their days. Even grandparents have a day. Our culture understands the importance of feeling and showing appreciation. But when non-Christians gather on Thursday and they say, "thanks," what is the point?

As Christians, like the foreigner leper that was cleansed, we know Whom we are thanking. We know from where our blessings come. We desire to return and praise the One from Whom all blessings flow.

However, our culture is a lot like the other nine. They ask for blessings, they receive blessings, they never stop to thank God for the blessings.

You know, we always want to remind our neighbors that Jesus is the reason for the Christmas season, but isn't He the reason behind Thanksgiving too? Shouldn't more non-Christians have issue with this holiday as well?

It may not have a man in a red suit to steal the spotlight, but Thanksgiving is a whole lot more than gathering with loved ones and eating turkey until we all fall asleep watching football.

What are you doing to keep Christ in Thanksgiving?

Thankfulness

2011-11-21T12:20:00.001-08:00

I can hardly believe that it is already Thanksgiving! The holidays are officially upon us. Where did the year go?! It seems like I have just gotten used to writing 2011 and now it is time to start writing 2012.

For those of you that are on Facebook, you may have noticed many of your "friends" participating in the an annual practice of posting a different thing that that they are thankful for each day leading up to Thanksgiving. I love the creativity of many of the posts. Some of my Facebook friends have really put some thought into what they are thankful for, while others started strong, but have failed to remember to continue to post as the month has progressed.

If you are like me, you have to-do list far longer than you have the hours and minutes to complete it. I prayed this morning for God to prioritize the things that really needed done and to enable me to let go of the things that don't. I realized that as I sat down to write this, that I have been so wrapped up in my lists, my goals and my plans, that I have failed to make time to reflect and be thankful.

So, first off, I am thankful for a holiday to help me to stop, reflect and truly appreciate all the blessings God has so graciously and richly lavished upon me and mine. I am sobered to think how most of the year I so quickly rush through the days and fail to stop and thank the One who gave me each one of those days. I take them for granted. I take Him for granted.

There is a saying I have seen on Facebook and Pinterest (a cool site that I have wasted more and more time on!) that goes something like this: "What if you only woke up this morning with the things that you thanked God for yesterday?" While there is nothing in the Bible that reads quite like this, it is definitely worth pondering.

So what are you thankful for this Thanksgiving? This week? Today?

Feel free to write a prayer of thanksgiving to God in the comments. I think I will start us off.

Addiction

2011-11-18T07:57:00.000-08:00

My dear, close friend just found out that her beautiful, talented, young adult daughter is dead. She was in treatment and close to the end of fighting a very long and difficult battle as a heroin addict. From all indications, she had beaten the disease. She was free. Free, that is, until her roommates found her face down in the bathtub full of water. Was it suicide? Overdose? To her parents and those who loved her….the answer to that question is futile. She is gone.

Her Godly parents are devastated. Grief stricken. Overcome. And, as my friend says, she is “living her worst nightmare”.

We have been friends since before high school. There are seven of us who have been friends since then and we get together at least once a year even though we are miles apart. They are all in Texas and I am in Indiana. My heart grieves and it is almost unbearable for me to be so far away….unable to give her a hug. Cry with her. Clean her bathrooms. You know, do the things we do.

Do you ever feel so inadequate to know what to do? What to say? How to help? After all….of the seven, I am the only pastor’s wife. I should be the “one” to know just what to do and say. Yet, I am speechless and immobile.

Do you ever feel the pressure to know what to do? Have all the answers? Just because you are the minister’s wife? As I have pondered this thought….God reminded me that of course, I don’t have to have all the answers. It is not my job to make everything “OK”. That is His job. BUT, He admonished me to remember what I said in the last post about spending time in the Word. It is important for me, yes!! But….so often when I am sitting at His feet and He is teaching me precious Truths….it is not only for me but He also will give it to me to give to someone else.

How thankful I am for His Word. I shared Psalm 94:17-19 with her this morning and I would encourage you to read it. Are you also dealing with a child who is an addict? A loved one? A friend? You? I am praying for you.

Confession

2011-11-16T06:13:00.000-08:00

I must confess that in the last couple of weeks I have not been in the Word like I need/want to be. I have not been in the Word like God wants/needs me to be. I know it is erroneous. I hate it. I am stuck. I know what to do but I just don't do it. I do everything and anything else that "needs" to be done!

Now, don’t get me wrong…..I am IN the Word!! After all, I teach lots of Godly women each Sunday and most Wednesdays the Word. I have studied and prayed and written and labored and applied. I spoke the Truth at a retreat last weekend which required me to be IN the Word as I prepared and presented the Truth.

Here’s the problem…..I have been in the Word to teach and speak to others…..in the Word for others but not in the Word because I need to spend time with God and get nourished and fed and encouraged and strengthened and convicted and…..etc. This is a trap that I find myself in way too often….a trap the enemy sets for me like bait and I fall for it every time.

Do you ever struggle with not spending time in the Word? Not just to teach. Not just to prepare. Not to give to anyone else…but to sit at the feet of Jesus and let Him love you. Let’s all stop now and as Nike would say, “Just Do It!”

Right now I am going to go do just that…..I KNOW He has water for me. Bread. Life.

Blessings to you sisters! Eat up!

Confess Your Sins To One Another

2011-11-15T06:15:00.000-08:00

James 5:16 tells us to “...confess your sins to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” I am concerned that this command is one of the least well-thought-out ones in scripture….especially for us who are minister’s wives!! Oh, don't get me wrong....not the prayer part--for sure we are good at that!! But what about the "confess" part? How often do we do that?

What? I am to confess MY sins to someone? Who? Why? What will they think?

Why? Because we have been told to do it. God knows we cannot fight many of the battles that stand in our way of Godliness and holiness alone and we are in desperate need of accountability and prayer and support. Because transparency is important to the Body of Christ.

Who? Someone who is Godly. Someone who will pray for you and hold you accountable. Someone who will encourage you as you turn from your sin. Someone who will help “bear your burden”.

There are some obvious cautions, however! Be VERY wise about who you confess your sins to!! You want to be sure it is someone who will not confess YOUR sins to anyone else!! Perhaps our husbands would be a good “one another” to confess to! Hummm….that brings up another interesting point—perhaps our pride is keeping us from confessing???

Note that James does not tell us to confess someone else’s sins to one another!! Sadly, I have been around many minister’s wives who:

A) Don’t confess their sins to anyone
B) Do confess other’s sins to one another

Ladies….I have much to confess, so I need to go and find a "one another!!

Don't Forget

2011-11-08T07:49:00.000-08:00

I am getting ready to head out the door for Arkansas for the wedding on Friday. I was in such a hurry last night packing and getting things in the car that this morning I discovered I had forgotten my shoes to go this my outfit for the rehearsal dinner. Wouldn't I look cute walking around in my black flip flops? (Probably no one would care because it is Arkansas and this Arkansan is not fond of shoes). No girlfriends, I did not fotget the Peanut M & Ms!

Anyway, I did not want to forget to remind you ladies for come to two special events for ministers wives at the state convention in Hendersonville.

The Good Cup
November 14, 2011
1:00-3:30 (during the pastor's conference)
First Baptist Church, Hendersonville Youth Pit
Special Guest:
     Matt and Darlene Tullos
     Kay DeKalb-Smith
This is a FREE event designed epecially for you. We promise fellowship, food, and food!

Ministers Wives Luncheon
November 15, 2011
Noon-1:30 p.m.
Long Hollow Baptist Church, 3031 Long Hollow Pike, Hendersonville
Special Guest:
     Shawnah Shingleton
Music by:
     Long Hollow Praise Team
Cost: $15 (Register online at www.tnministerswives.org or if we forget you can register at the Ministers Wives Booth at the convention).
Mission Project: Bring old eye glasses to send to a foreign country in need.
This event is always fun and the food is fabulous. Plus, everyone walks away with fun filled goodie bags. In addition, there will be door prizes given away including a free night at a Bed and Breakfast; free weekend at one of our conference centers; and free registration for Ministers Wives Retreat, 2012!!!

Don't forget to mark your calendars. I'll see you there!

Life Saver

2011-11-07T17:32:00.000-08:00

If you are just logging in to the blog this week, I need to get you up to speed with what is going on in my life. In four days our youngest son is getting married at Thorncrown Chapel in Eureka Springs, Arkansas. Yep, that is THIS Friday. Yep, I have been planning another along distance wedding rehearsal dinner. (My first privilege was two and half years ago when our oldest son and his wife held their rehearsal and wedding in St. Francisville, Louisiana).

All I can say is "Whew!" I am too tired to scream myself so I am letting my pound bag of M & M's do the yelling for me. I have spent today doing housework, washing and ironing, packing all the needed supplies for the rehearsal decorations. When I finish posting I still have to pack my clothes and oversee my very patient husband on how to pack the car so that items do not get crushed.

Now God has blessed me with the spiritual gift of service. You tell me what you want me to do and I will do it. I am not in any form or fashion an organized person. As a result, planning and making sure all the details are in order for our part of the wedding is just a bit STRESSFUL. All I can say is I owe the creators of Post-It-Notes a huge hug because they are my life savers.

Speaking of life savers . . .aren't you glad we serve the real Life Saver? Here I am counting the days until my son's wedding and I find myself suddenly wondering if Jesus might be counting the days until His wedding day. Honestly, I am ashamed that I did not pause longer today to truly spend time preparing myself for my Savior's big day.

Ladies, even if we are overwhelmed and overworked in our daily task, we still need to stop and cling to our Life Saver. He is the only one who will see us through the stressful moments (weddings) of life.

Praying through the Bumps in the Road

2011-11-06T12:51:00.000-08:00

I am eating lots of chocolate these days for in five shorts days our family dynamic will change once again. On November 11 our youngest son, Bryan, will marry his high school sweetheart, Shannon. Everyone knows that with every wedding comes a few bumps in the planning. For example, our son, Stephen, who is an Air Force Security Force officer, was told he could not attend his brother's wedding so Bryan had to enlist another best man. My college freshman niece, who was to assist Robyn, our daughter-in-law and a professional photographer, learned that her quarter ends and finals begin so she will not be able to attend. Then, last Wednesday after wedding programs have been printed, the bride-to-be learned that the soloist would not be able to attend because her employer decided not to let her take time off. Thankfully, Shannon has another friend who has agreed to step in and learn the song in last than a week. However, in the midst of these few bumps, my husband and I are two very blessed parents because God has given our sons, Stephen and Bryan, godly young ladies, Robyn and Shannon, to share their lives with.

I share all this with you because I have many friends who are still raising younger children. I watch them struggle with homework stress, dating issues, peer and social pressure, and much more. I remember just trying to survive one day at a time with our boys. Of course, your children, like mine, probably suffer through taunts of being a "minister's kid" or "PK." When my friends ask for advice in dealing with these issues or on how my husband and I raised our sons, I simply tell them to "pray through the bumps in the road."

From the day we learned we were expecting, my husband and I prayed for our sons. We prayed for their health, protection, for both to come to salvation in Jesus, and also that God would lead each son to that special girl created epecially for them. Also, although we did not know the names of those two girls, we prayed the same prayers over them and for their families. Although we are not perfect parents and have made lots of mistakes, I firmly believe that praying for our children was the right parenting choice.

Over the years we have watched our sons grow into godly young men. They definately have had their share for personal bumps in the road but God has been good to lead our sons along His chosen path for them. What is more amazing is that God has lead both of our sons to the two women He designed just for them.

So girlfriends, pray your children through the present and future bumps in the road and while you are at it, please pray our familiy through this next weeks. We sure do not need anymore bumps before the wedding. But just in case, I will have my emergency stash of Peanut M & Ms close by.

Can We Talk About Gifts?

2011-11-04T15:38:00.000-07:00

Ladies, do you love getting gifts? There is something special and exciting about receiving a package with your name on it , wrapped so beautifully. The size of the package does not matter, because as we all know, great gifts can come in small packages (a watch , a ring, a bracelet, etc.). Believe it or not, Christmas is just right around the corner, and many of us will get caught up in the gift buying, gift wrapping frenzy that accompanies this festive season of the year.

Material gifts do have their place, and I will be the first to admit that I love buying and receiving them. But do you ever think about spiritual gifts? Those wonderful, priceless abilities that the Lord gives us as His children. As daughters of the King we were given at least one spiritual gift when He adopted us into His family. Just as material gifts are not all the same, God’s gifts come in different varieties. Some of you may be gifted in teaching, some exhorting or encouraging, some serving, some giving, some showing mercy, some in administration, and on and on. Lists of the different gifts are found in God’s Word in 1 Corinthians 12 (the entire chapter deals with gifts), Romans 12: 6-8, and 1 Peter 4: 10-11.

Our Father in His infinite wisdom wanted us to be able to give to others based on how He has gifted us. As ministers’ and pastors’ wives we know we are called to serve in some capacity…...it comes with the territory. Yet we should do it joyously and graciously. When the apostle Paul talked about spiritual gifts in 1 Corinthians 12, it is interesting that the Holy Spirit had him follow with the “Love Chapter” in 1 Corinthians 13, for if we do not exercise our gifts in a spirit of love we are “a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal” (1 Corinthians 13:1). In other words, we might be doing, doing, doing, but if the motivation is not for the love of God and the love and edification of His people, it is done in vain.

Friends, let us embrace the gifts that the Lord has given us, and as the “gift buying, gift giving” season approaches, remember that Christ , our greatest gift, has come so that we may have new life in Him. Let us serve Him and His people as the body of Christ is built up in love.

“There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord.” 1 Corinthians 12:4-5 (NIV)

An Answer To Prayer

2011-11-01T12:23:00.000-07:00

In my introductory blog I told you that I am a stay-at-home mom. Well, for the past 5 years I have had a job that I am able to perform from home; I am also a part time bookkeeper. Before I left the workplace I was a financial analyst; since then the Lord has not allowed my knowledge in that area to become “rusty”.

Right before our youngest daughter went to kindergarten, I prayed and asked the Lord that, if it was possible, to allow me to have a job that would give me the flexibility to still be at home but also bring in additional income for our family. In my heart I still wanted to be available for my family, so I earnestly wanted to do something I could manage from home. By God's grace I was not lacking the resources to make that desire a reality, after all, I had a computer, and I had not forgotten all of my skills from the workplace. Surely, someone would hire me………….

I remember being very explicit in my request to God, and then waiting expectantly to see how He would answer. About three months after Arianna, our youngest, started school, someone who had recently started a new business was looking for someone to work as an administrative assistant…….guess who got the job! I initially performed various administrative duties, but over time as the company grew, the focus of my duties became primarily bookkeeping and accounting tasks.

WOW! The Lord answered my very specific prayer! I cannot tell you that God has always answered my prayers this quickly. There are some things that I am still petitioning Him about and have not yet received an answer. But I do know this: the Lord is truly attentive to the prayers of His children!

Friends, have you been praying about something, and still have not received an answer from the Lord? Sometimes the answer comes quickly, at other times it may be longer, still other times we are told to wait, and maybe, just maybe the Lord gives us a “No”. However He decides to answer, we must always trust Him and remember He knows what is best, for HE IS GOD!

1 Thessalonians 5:17 “Keep on praying” (NLT)

Pleased To Meet You!

2011-10-30T16:07:00.000-07:00

Hello, everyone! My name is Tonya, and I am very pleased to be the new writer for The TN Prime Rib blog. Lana Rose invited me to become a part of the blogging team, and I am very excited about what the Lord will speak through me as I write to each of you. Blogging is new to me, but I feel that this is a calling from the Lord, since I love to write and to encourage others.

Since I am the “new kid on the block”, let me tell you a few things about myself. I live in Chattanooga, TN (born and raised there) with my husband of 18 years, Gerald O’Guinn. We have two daughters, Ashley is 15 and Arianna is 10. Also I have a stepdaughter, Deonna, who is 25 and lives in Flint Michigan, along with our little grandson, Dahnaven, who is 4.

The Lord led me and my husband to bring me out of the workplace in 1998 to be a stay-at-home mom to our daughter Ashley, who was 2 years old at the time. Other than becoming a Christian, and of course marrying my husband, that was one of the best decisions that I have ever made. Prior to that I worked for 13 years as a financial analyst for the Tennessee Valley Authority (TVA). I can honestly say that I have never had a moment’s regret about that decision; of course, it has meant some sacrifices, but it’s all been worth it. I cannot put a price on being a worker at home and taking care of the needs of my family.

Also, I have been a pastor’s wife for 7 years. My husband was a minister at a church for 7 years before he was called to our current church as the pastor……so I guess you can say I have been a ministry wife for 14 years. I have learned a lot over these years, and I will be sharing some insights of my journey in future blogs.

I really love the Lord, and I love His Word, so in the weeks and months ahead I will share with you some great verses from the Bible (they all are great!) that have touched my heart and hopefully will be an encouragement to you.

Again, I praise God who gave me this opportunity to write to you………..new friends, I am pleased to meet you!

1 Timothy 1:12 “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service.” (NIV)

Lots of Blessings

2011-10-28T13:52:00.000-07:00

- Opportunities to minister to others.
- Closer, deeper relationship with my husband.
- More intimate relationship with my friends who've experienced similar loss.
- Increased faith in God's provision and presence in my life.
- More appreciation for the precious gifts of both my healthy daughters.
- New and fresh insights into the truth of God's word.

I could go on and on about the many blessings that God has opened my eyes to through this experience.

Many have said that one day I will know "why". That may or may not be true on either side of heaven. I can say "why not me?" as easy as I can say "why me?".

Regardless, our God is sovereign. He is the giver and taker of life. He has given me Jesus and promised to never leave me or forsake me. That is enough.

If there were no lessons for me to learn, if my faith was already Paul-like in its consistency, if I would never be able to minister to another through this experience - His decision to take this baby was His decision. That is all that it needs to be.

Yet, He does teach me, use me and draw me closer to Himself. There I was in all my self-righteousness and pride, feeling like I had it altogether, like I had Him all figured out. I prayed for His way. I prayed for this child to be His. I prayed that His will be done.

It was. He did. He is. He will.

He heard my prayers. He raised my eyes back to Him to look full in His wonderful face. He gave me perspective as the things of this earth grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.

He is so good. He is so good to me.

More Unexpected Blessings

2011-10-26T12:33:00.000-07:00

I am not sure why, although I could make some pretty good theories, but there are more ladies out there who have struggled through miscarriages in silence than I ever would have imagined.

The nurse practitioner at my doctor's office told me that 30% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. I thought she was lying. That is nearly one third. Sure, a few of my girlfriends had experienced this loss, but 30%!?

As I have tried to be open and transparent about what I am learning/growing in Christ through this, I have had literally countless friends, acquaintances and virtual strangers confide that they too have experienced the pain that comes with miscarriage. The 30% number does not seem so crazy now.

It's these ladies whose words of encouragement have meant so much. They are indeed the ones that know what to and what not to say, when to and when not to say whatever should or should not be said.

An unknown number of our Christian sisters, church members and lost friends and family members have suffered in silence or are even now in pain. My reason for hashing all this out in such a public way is to make my self and my story available for God to use as He sees fit. Wally and I desire "our" story to be used to minister to these that are hurting and for God to be glorified in the process.

We so want others to be able to see that we do really believe all that we have said we believe - that God's promises of His goodness and mercy are just as real in the hard times as they are in the easy ones. So, we are refusing to put on our "church masks" and just "say" the right things, the things that everyone expects us to say. We need to be real, especially now, especially in our loss, in our sadness, in our hurt.

I am now a member of a new sorority, a new sisterhood. Just as I prayed that God would use me in my college sorority chapter, I am praying that God will use me in this one too. I have received many unexpected blessings already in this sisterhood. I am now so much closer to so many ladies- they have been a blessing to me. I pray that God will allow me that same privilege too.

A Different Blessing

2011-10-24T12:05:00.000-07:00

In my mind I have started this blog a thousand times and a thousand different ways.

I was so looking forward to sharing my good news with you this week. I was excited about sharing the blessing that God had given us. By now, you've notice my use of past tense verbs, and are assuming that my news is no longer happy and the blessing is, well, different.

Yesterday I would have been nine weeks pregnant. Wally and I were excited to announce that Vinson Baby #3 was on its way. Then, last Monday began one of the longest weeks of my life. At nearly midnight, the OBGYN on call at Gateway Hospital here in Clarksville confirmed what we had spent the previous 24 hours fearing. The baby was gone.

Friends and family have stepped up and ministered to us. The church and the association, (where Wally works) are still patient and understanding. God has shown me numerous verses and has gently reminded me of His presence reassuring me that He is indeed in control.

Thankfully my body is healing, but my heart is still aching.

I walked through Wal-Mart Saturday afternoon and wondered how many other people were hurting on the inside as I was. I wondered how many others were walking around feeling as badly or even worse than me but were able to hide it even better than I could.

I have hope. I have Christ. I know the truth of God's word that makes my loss bearable. But how many are out there that don't have Him for their hope and don't know the truth of His word?

For awhile, I think I will have more patience with that complete stranger who seems so inconsiderate. Only God knows what is going on in her heart or in his life.

This is just one of the different, unexpected blessings I am experiencing this week.

A New Place in Life's Journey

2011-10-21T09:54:00.000-07:00

My brother and I are at the age where I will just call us“Tweens.” No, it is not those couple ofyears between childhood and teen years, but the years between having familiesof our own and assisting our aging parents. Since November of last year our parent’s health has deteriorated and ourmom is really struggling. We are forcedto juggle careers, our own family, and meet the needs of our parents.

Some of you may be walking through this time as well or youhave already gained your experience. Ican tell you that no one can prepare you for this period in your life. I struggle daily with being eight hours frommy parents. I wonder if they are eatingcorrectly, hearing the doctor’s correctly, etc. There are many sleepless nights and even some tears. I mean, these are the same parents who wipedmy snotty nose and made sure I grew into a productive adult who lovesJesus. Now, my brother and I are theones making regular trips to our parent’s home and assisting them with simpletask like shopping, cooking, cleaning, and caring for themselves. At this point my parents are refusing todownsize to a smaller place or assisted living. At least they have agreed to have someone come in once a month toclean. Honestly, I am just so confused.

However, recently a dear friend who has been like a brotherto me since we were three years old shared his heart with me. He knows I blog for ministers wives and alsomeet many of you through the various retreats and conferences. He sent me an email telling me how after muchprayer for me in the ministry I have and with the issues with my parents thathe feels I have a perfect platform to reach out to others, to share myexperience, and to offer hope. Thisfriend knows what it is like to go through this “tween” stage in life for helost his only brother, mother, and father just this year. He and his wife have been giving my brotherand me some advice that they learned and it is helping us deal with ourparticular situation. What anencouragement my friend has been as my family just begins the next lifejourney.

And this stage in life is exactly a new journey. I am learning that God will walk with myfamily as we handle our parents. Godloves my parents and so do we. God wantsthe best for them and so do we. Girlfriends,I am going to be brutally honest and say that I do not like to see my parentsor anyone suffer. What this journey isteaching me right now is not to take our family (parents) for granted.

In the meantime, I will continue to make the eight hourdrive about once a month to attempt to meet some of their needs. I will have a supply of Peanut M & Ms in the car with me. But more importantly God will be walking withme through this stage of life. One thingI ask is that you pray for my family through this time, and if you have “beenthere, done that,” please share encouragement and advice for me and otherministers wives who may be in the middle of this journey. You never know who you might impact with yourcomment.

God bless you all,

Vickie Lee

A Duh Moment

2011-10-17T16:50:00.001-07:00

"Well duh, Vickie. Do you think God is trying to tell you something today." Those were my words as I finished my quiet time today. I use the Journey guide (Lifeway) and Jesus Calling by Sarah Young as tools for my quiet time. I was surprised how today's passage in both guides was from Luke 12:22-31. Apparently, God needed to hammer the message in my brain and heart.

I do have a lot on my plate and going on in my life that I am "concerned" about these days. Here is my list:
-my parent's health and decisions to be made
-upcoming wedding of my youngest son
-a job for my son; praise the Lord, his bride to be landed a good job
-home improvements that need to be done but lacking the funds
-friends who are without jobs
-spiritual revival for our church
-and many other decisions to be made

All of these "concerns" seem to be consuming my mind lately. Oh yes, I pray about them and will leave them for a bit a God's feet. However, later Satan slips in the doubt which multiples into worry. In the end I pick up these concerns again from God and try to handle them myself. This silly venture only leaves me eating chocolate by the handful, restless, tired, overwhelmed, and stressed. I am totally useless to anyone and most importantly not trusting God to handle any of them.

The Father has a plan for all my concerns (or in this case, worries). He knows my needs and my future. In the end I just need to rest secure in the fact that God already has everything answered in His will and that He has been working on it since the beginning of time.

test

2011-10-16T15:13:00.000-07:00

Having some problems posting. This is a test.

Chocolate Lover

2011-10-16T14:55:00.000-07:00

It is funny. I have been one of the writers for this blog for several years and I have discovered one thing. When I meet ladies across the state of Tennessee who read our blog postings, I am known not by Vickie but as the chocolate lover.

I find this rather humorous because there is so much more depth to me. I love to have fun. Laughter makes me a much better minister's wife. As you know, I love spending time with my girlfriends and my family. The beach is where I stand in awe of God and can quietly sit for hours on end just listening to His voice in the roar of the waves. However, chocolate is one of my favorite things created by God.

It was interesting one day several months ago that while I was doodling ideas on the page that a chocolate thought spilled across the page. When I finished, I just laughed and said,"Wow, chocolate can be spiritual."

C-Christ Jesus
H-Holy One
O-Only
C-Child
O-of the
L-Living God
A-Almighty King
T-the
E-Everlasting Life

I love it when the Father takes something I love (chocolate) and creates a beautiful reminder of His love (Jesus) for us.

Fix It

2011-10-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

So ladies…admit it. We like to “fix” things. And I don’t mean the kind of fixing that requires tools. I am talking about the kind of fixing that requires manipulation and planning and operating and managing and figuring. You know, when situations and circumstances start to look like they are not going to turn out the way we think they should turn out. We know we can “fix” it!! We are women! “Fixers”!!

Sarai and Abram (later named Abraham and Sarah) went to another country to find food since there was a famine in the land….and Abraham was fearful that the king would want Sarah because she was so beautiful. SO they decided to “fix” it by telling the king that Sarai was Abram’s sister instead of his wife. Now get this—they did this “fixing” two separate times!! Funny how we don’t seem to learn our “fixing” lessons the first time!!

Then….when it looked like God’s promise to Abraham that he would have a son from his own body was not going to happen with Sarah’s body—they decided to “fix” it by giving Hagar to Abraham to produce the son. Now, let me ask you—did that “fix” anything? NO!! It made a HUGE mess that still affects us today. Instead of Sarah and Abraham waiting on God to do what He promised to do His way, they tried to “fix” it.

You and I KNOW that God’s ways are always infinitely better than our ways. We KNOW that His timing is always perfect and we usually get in a rush. We KNOW that He is sovereign and He can be trusted. Why is it then, that what we KNOW to be true—we often do the opposite? Hard question to answer for sure!

Let’s commit to pray for each other—that for today. Or this week. Or this month. Or this year. We will NOT run out of the center of God’s will and try to “fix” things! Stop trying to “fix” things for our church. For our husbands. For our children!! What? Really? We can’t intervene and “fix” everything for our kids???? Seriously?

Remember our God is faithful. His plans will not be thwarted. Let’s step back and watch Him do His thing!!

Way of Plenty by Way of Testing

2011-10-11T09:24:00.001-07:00

Have you (or you and your husband) ever made a decision to do what you honestly, sincerely, wholeheartedly felt/knew God was calling/asking/commanding you to do….like Abram and Sarai did when God told them to leave their home and families and friends and go to a place He would show them? (Genesis 12)

Have you ever doubted that decision later when things did not seem to be going very well? Nothing was turning out the way you thought they would/should!! Perhaps you encountered opposition, unrest, difficulty, health issues….honestly the list could go on and on. I had totally forgotten that when Abram and Sarai got to their “promised” land things did not work out too well for them either!!

First of all, the land was already occupied!! (Genesis 12:6) I think about pastors/ministers who go to a church where the previous pastor/minister still attends—for sure, that “land” is occupied!! Or maybe they are not still there physically but they for sure are still there in the minds and hearts of the people!! When Abram and Sarai arrived “in the land” there was no fanfare—no pounding. No huge welcome.

Secondly, not long after they got there, there was a “famine in the land”! (Genesis 12:10). What in the world? We take off in obedience and faith and end up in a place that is already occupied and then a famine?? Perhaps your “famine” is a spiritual famine—for you or your church. There is no growth. There is decay and death. Dryness. Church is not growing. You are not growing. People are mean. Famine.

Do we begin to doubt God now? What do we tell ourselves? This place is terrible! Do we question? Did God mess up? Did we hear him correctly? Did we make a wrong turn? If you ever encounter anything like this let me encourage you to not doubt what God originally told you to do. Do not doubt Him or your calling.

Often times the way of plenty is through the way of testing. Think “God thoughts” during the famines of your life!!

My Utmost for His Highest

2011-10-06T15:13:00.000-07:00

I am sure you recognize the title of this blog. Oswald Chambers is without a doubt one of my favorite saints to read. His book is one that I use along side of my Bible daily. He brings understanding to what God is teaching me and gives me no room for excuses.

I guess what I want to leave with each of you is that we MUST give our Utmost for His Highest! It is not a choice. If we are to do eternity work, kingdom work, it is going to take giving my all to Him and allowing our God to do whatever it takes to bring His purpose for each of us to fulfillment.

There are many commands, but Jesus clearly told us the most important. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength. And the second is like it, Love your neighbor as yourself."

There it is sisters. This journey we are on is not about us. We have been specifically called by our God to fulfill His purposes. That means He will be removing what is not part of that purpose, He will be requiring obedience without questions, He will be asking for our time, our money, our family, our ALL.

Friends, it is worth it and it is difficult! I look forward to meeting each of you in eternity, but let's begin now preparing, sharing, serving with all our hearts, all our minds, all our strength! See you forever!

Think Like God Thinks

2011-10-05T19:05:00.000-07:00

As wives of ministers we often feel set apart from those around us. We sometimes feel we have unrealistic expectations put upon us. What other people think about us can cause us great stress, unhappiness or joy.

As Christians, we are taught in scripture how God wants us to think. He gives us very specific instructions for His expectations for our lives. Most of the battles we fight are in our minds, therefore, we must begin to "Think Like God Thinks"

Philippians 4:9 "Finally brethren (or sisters), whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy, think on these things."

The things listed in the above passage are the very characteristics of our God. As we come to know Him better, spend more time with Him, listen and obey Him, we begin to think like Him. As we think like our God, what those around us think becomes less important and serving them becomes a joy.

Spend time with Him and listen to His thoughts. Allow His thoughts to become your thoughts and watch Him love those around you through you.

Time To Move On

2011-10-04T15:14:00.000-07:00

Hi Ladies,

This is my last week to blog for you on this Minister's Wife blog. I have prayed about God's will for me and He has been rearranging my schedule. I am so glad He is in charge and not me!

As God changes His call in my life, I am going to miss sharing with each of you, yet eagerly look forward to those He is bringing into my life in new ways.

Let me remind you that God has the perfect plan for you and your family. It is never hidden or just out of reach, it is just a matter of obedience. Being in ministry often causes us to forget the importance of obedience because we are constantly responding to the most urgent, loudest complaint, biggest hurt or newest problem.

I want to encourage you to stop and listen to His call. It will always be perfect, if you will just obey. I know that it is not always easy, but it is definitely always best.

I pray God will give me wisdom to share with you in these last few blogs this week and we will continue to grow in Him together. Everyday, I love Him more, I pray this for you.

Pastor's Wife

2011-09-30T06:04:00.000-07:00

I just want to be me!!

Don’t get me wrong, I love being a pastor’s wife, but sometimes, I would just love to slip in and sit on the pew unnoticed. It would be nice to slide in and slide out without being stopped every few feet with questions or suggestions?

I wonder how it would feel to be the last to arrive at church and be the first to leave. What if we only had to come to church services……….no meetings, no counseling, etc.?

What if we could gain weight without anyone noticing? What if we could loose weight without anyone noticing? Or get a new hair style without EVERYONE noticing or even a new outfit? What if we could purchase a car or boat or something else without anyone truly noticing?

Wouldn't it be nice to go to church and sit on the pew without KNOWING so much? I mean, as a pastor's wife… we KNOW if there are any problems in the church and we KNOW the trouble makers. We KNOW the unfaithful people and the people that are not dependable. We KNOW the ones that are having marital problems. We KNOW the ones that are in financial trouble.

Sometimes, I guess, I feel like we truly do live in a fishbowl (just as Tara spoke about a few posts back) and I am overwhelmed. (Even though, like Tara said, we should embrace it and let the world see Christ through us.)

I am humbled to live in my fishbowl for others to see...be it good or bad. When I am truly honest with myself......I would not have it any other way. I would miss it all; the good and the bad.

God called me to be a pastor's wife and I am honored to serve in that capacity.

Exciting Times Are Coming

2011-09-28T05:27:00.000-07:00

*Fall!
**Football!
***Thanksgiving!
****Christmas!
*****New Years!
******Wedding!

• FALL – apples, leaves changing, cooler weather, pumpkins, etc.

• FOOTBALL – Alabama (Sorry…we are from Alabama), or Tennessee, or Florida

(Sorry…our son-in-law is a Gator fan), etc.

• THANKSGIVING – pies, turkey, dressing, giving thanks, family, friends, etc.

• CHRISTMAS – Birth of Christ, baking, decorations, presents, cards, lights, trees, family, friends, etc.

• NEW YEARS – out with the old and in with the new; a time to wipe the slate clean and start over; the ball dropping; a new beginning…

• WEDDING – Cody and Melanie’s “Big Day”; the beginning of their lives together; the completion of our children – two girls and two boys (not including future grandchildren. ), etc.

All of these are important events and all deserve all of the careful planning, preparing and anticipating AND there is nothing wrong with it………………however, wouldn’t it be even greater if we got as excited for the second coming of our Lord? We say we are excited. We say we are preparing. We say we are anticipating…..but are we? Sometimes our actions prove differently.

Let’s try to make it our goal to get as EXCITED with ANTICIPATION for our ETERNAL FUTURE as we do when we are making plans for our earthly future.

Welcome FALL!!!

2011-09-27T05:16:00.000-07:00

Empty Your Vessel

2011-09-26T05:17:00.000-07:00

We hear all the time that we must fill our vessels.

However, you MUST first empty your vessel of all of “yourself”….to make room for God to fill it with him.

Many times we want to pour out part of ourselves and want God to just work around what remains of us. God wants all or none. He does not like lukewarm.

In order for your walk with Christ to be where you should be you must pour ALL of YOURSELF out and turn EVERYTHING over to HIM.

When our children were growing up, we tried to teach them that God wants control of ALL of our lives and not just the “churchie” part. Until we truly turn it all over to God we can not totally be in his will.

It is easy for us to tell non-Christians to come on and get saved that God will help them to turn away from sin….but, as Christians, we many times tend to just HANG-ON to ourselves, thinking that just a wee little bit won’t make that much difference.

As I stated before…God is a jealous God. He wants ALL of us or NONE of us. So, Ladies…let’s empty our vessels of every last drop so that God can take complete control of our lives.

A "Real" Interesting Position

2011-09-23T10:13:00.000-07:00

Ladies, you may find this hard to believe. I am sure it is pretty rare and I am definitely asking for your input and prayers.

As of the close of business meeting Wednesday night, I am officially on the Pastor Search Committee for our church.

I know! How crazy for a minister's wife to be on a pastor search committee?! What a unique opportunity this is!

First, I may need to explain my husband's position. He works for our local association of nearly 50 churches and ministries. Together, he and our Associational Missionary minister to unite and help to individually grow these churches. It is a challenging job, and puts my hubby in a different church nearly every Sunday. Yes, sometimes he preaches but most often ministers to ministers. So, while I am a minister's wife, he just is not a minister at the church we are members of.

A deacon and his sweet wife visited my husband and me. They asked if we would consider my service in this capacity and of course, to pray about it. I have been so humbled and overwhelmed. I have never had an opportunity to serve like this, and, honestly, never expected one.

My husband has never served as a pastor, but has served under several. We have met with personnel committees and student ministry committees, but never a pastor search committee. I really have no idea as to what to expect. So, that is why I am asking for your help.

What kind of questions should I ask? When should I speak up in our meetings? What are the kind of things you think the committee ought to focus on? What kind of things do you wish pastor search committees would do? Wouldn't do?

I truly believe that I will be able to bring some interesting insights to this committee because I have the interesting position of being a minister's wife. Please pray for me, this committee and our church.

A "Real" Fishbowl

2011-09-21T19:03:00.000-07:00

One of the valuable nuggets of truth that I am taking from the retreat came from God through Shawna Shingleton.

Honestly, I cannot remember her exact session title, but her heart was evident. When she talked about the fishbowl we ministers' families live in, she gave me a whole new perspective. She challenged us to think about it as a positive instead of the negative. She pointed out that the world has plenty of negative fishbowls to watch. Have you watched much "reality" television lately?! We need to rise to the occasion and be the positive, healthy, godly example that our churches and communities need.

As I thought about this truth I realized that instead of resenting my aquarium status, I need to embrace it. After all, we are called to salt and light! Even Jesus spoke of setting the light on a stand to light the whole house. Ladies, we have the answer in Christ to every problem facing every home in America, shouldn't we want to advertise that? Shouldn't we let our home be the positive influence?

So, instead of trying to figure out how to "hide" in our fishbowl, my prayer is that the Vinson Family will be a "Real" fishbowl where the church and the community can see Christ at work in us. It may not always be pretty, but I am praying that it will always be authentic. Whatcha see is whatcha get!

Thanks for sharing your heart Shawna!

A "Real" Blessing

2011-09-20T15:09:00.000-07:00

Like Dana, I was honored to be a part of the East Tennessee Ministers' Wives Retreat at Carson's Springs a couple of weekends ago. I enjoyed sitting under her teaching, making new friends and eating LOTS of chocolate. Our fellow blogger, Vickie, was on the planning team for the event and, if you've followed our blog for long, you know her love for all things chocolate. I can't help but wonder if she had some influence over the weekend's chocolate and friendship theme. Hmmmmm.

It had been a long while since I had been with Dana and Vickie in person and it was nice to reconnect face-to-face at least a little. But it was a "real" blessing to get to meet some of our blog readers for "real."

You see, as I have written in this virtual world of blogging, I have not had a single face to have as a mental image of an audience as I have written. I have thought of various ministers' wives who are friends, but I am not sure how many of them actually read our posts. While some of you respond to our blogs, it is still sometimes hard to picture who our readers "really" are. Sometimes I feel like I am writing a diary or in a journal, and it is hard to remember that there are "real" women reading my posts.

As some of you approached me saying you've read my posts, my mind swirled trying to remember all the things I had confided to you in my blogs. Then I felt silly thinking how could I "confide" anything in such a public way!

So, who did I learn that our blog readers are? You are "real" women with "real" hearts and very "real" hurts and needs. You are beautiful daughters of our King, sisters in the faith and co-laborers in our Father's vineyards. We come from various sized churches. We are in various life stages. We are united in a unique sorority, being married to ministers.

Thank you Ladies for your warm welcome and encouraging words. Thank you for being exactly the you that God created you to be and for serving Him in the place that He has ordained for you to serve. Thank you for ministering to me.

If you have a second, whether you attended the weekend or not, could you respond to this post? It would be a great encouragement to all of us that write to know you are reading. It doesn't have to be lengthy or say much at all, maybe just your name and where you live . . . It is just a good reminder to us that "real" ministers' wives who are "real" women, read our little blog.

Answers to Questions

2011-09-16T10:01:00.000-07:00

Below are the responses to two of the questions I asked ministers’ wives.

Question #1 Why do you think it is sometimes hard for ministers’ wives to have friends?

1. People are intimidated by us. (Honestly, that one almost makes me laugh out loud!! Are you kidding?? What in the world?? Me intimidate? I am an idiot!!)

2. They think we are not fun. (Now that one just makes me out right frustrated!! Not fun?? Do they think we just sit around with sour looks on our faces all day?? Hummm….maybe that is how we look?? Yikes!)

3. They think we already have tons of friends. (What they don’t know is that a lot of people are “friendly” but not a lot are “friends”.)

4. We move and they don’t want to get too close to us. (Heartbreaking isn’t it?)

5. We are “not from here”. (I for sure can relate to this one!! After living in a town for 15 years people would still say, “Oh, yea, you are not from here so…..”)

Question #2 What do you need/want in a friend? OR What is a True Friend?

Someone I can…..
1. Shop with
2. Pray with
3. Be accountable to/with
4. Hang out with
5. Be myself with/be real with
6. Share confidences with
7. Be honest with
8. Not be competitive with
9. Laugh with
10. Share my life/self with
11. Get beyond the superficial with
12. Who likes my family

Honestly, even though I have and do have lots of friends, I have only had a few that I could do all 12 of these with....and I am learning that that is OK!! Different people might meet different needs. God is the only one who will meet all of our needs!!

What would you add to these two lists?

Help! I Want A Friend!

2011-09-15T07:25:00.000-07:00

Are you sensing a need to develop close relationships? Are you even willing to admit your need for community? Do you even want people to get to know you? Get close to you? Are you fearful that if you drop your masks and walls that they won’t like the “real” you? What if they find out that you are not really very “spiritual”??!!

Once we admit that we definitely do need friendships…then below are a few additional ideas from what I talked about in the last post about how to go about developing Godly friendships.

Ask God to provide. Pray!! (Too often my philosophy is “Why pray when I can do something about it??” How terrible is that??)

Find a mentor—an older woman that walks with God and speaks Truth. These women will be your greatest joy and encouragement and friend!

Find a disciple—a younger woman who needs to know what it means to be a Godly wife or mother or woman. She will become a life-long friend.

Be genuine/real/transparent. Stop trying to be/look perfect!! Make a conscious choice to drop relational barriers and learn to reach below the surface to cultivate deep relationships.

Know when to move on. Unhealthy relationships rob and sap the life out of you! And know when to hold on. Sometimes a friend will pull away from you because she is running from God.

Re-connect. Locate old friends you have lost contact with.

Re-evaluate. If you float from one friend to another or have always had a hard time developing or continuing relationships—maybe (and I hate to say it) the problem is with you. Do you have control issues? Are you smothering? Do you have blind spots? Do you give way too much advice? Perhaps you are just too perfect?

Just a side note--Recognize that you might be in a season of waiting. Don’t just sit and wait it out. It is not a dry wasteland. Seasons of waiting can be a fertile soil where surprising new relationships spring up….or deep changes can happen within us.

During times of loneliness take stock of your life. It is during personal reflection that we often grow the most. We hardly ever reflect when things are going well....when we are full and feeling happy. Often times it is when we are hungry, empty, dry that we sit down and consider our options. Loneliness can be painful—but pain motivates us to evaluate.

I'd love to hear your insights on how you develop friends and/or deal with your seasons of loneliness.

Blessings to you, my friend!!

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

2011-09-13T08:50:00.000-07:00

Loved, loved, LOVED getting to meet many of you last weekend at the ministers’ wives retreat!! Thank you for your willingness to share with me one-on-one your struggles, victories, hurts and insights.

For many of you who were not able to attend, for this week’s blog, I thought I would share a few of the things we talked about…and for those of you who were there…I thought I would also share some of the things we did not get to talk about since I ran out of time!!!

If you want to develop friends then Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone! Look outside the box!! Do not miss the unlikely sources where God would provide rich friendships.

Mrs. Shelton and her sitter

I knew she had moved into her son’s basement next door but I had not met her. One day her son dropped by my house with a beautiful, hand crocheted table runner. He told me his mom made it for me!! What? I had never even met her!! Why did she do that? He began to tell me that every day he would take her on a drive to get her out of the house. Each day as they would drive by my house she would ask him about me. He would tell her that I was a pastor’s wife….and God knit our hearts together and she ministered to me before we even met!

The next day I took a walk to their home to meet and thank her. Right before my eyes sat a beautiful, 90 something year old woman with the clearest and most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. Her silver hair shone like glass and her smile spoke years of love and loving and being loved. She wanted me to come close and kiss me. She took my hands and as she peered into my eyes, she told me how very beautiful I was!! Over and over how beautiful I was!! That began a beautiful friendship!! Who wouldn’t want a friend who told you you were beautiful???!!

Sitting with her was another Godly woman who came every day to take care of her….and she loved Jesus so much!! Over the next several months I would drop by as often as I could and the three of us would sit and visit and share about our God. We looked at pictures of children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. We wept and prayed together over the children and grandchildren who grieved these Godly women because they were far from God.

I will never forget the day when the call came that Mrs. Shelton did not wake up. I called her sitter and we cried together. She taught me how important it is to take the initiative and look outside the box for friends.

Friends don’t usually end up on our door steps all wrapped in a bow! Choose to proactively reach out to others. Come to church early and stay late to visit and get to know people at your church. It might not be easy, but get out of your comfort zone and see how God blesses you and uses you to bless someone!!

Homework

2011-09-06T11:44:00.000-07:00

School has started and I imagine that homework is slowing being introduced into the daily lives of those of you who have school-aged children. When my boys were in grade school, it seemed that every night was spent drilling math facts or doing book reports. My sons, even Ricky and I, often bemoaned the mounds of homework. However, as parents, we stressed that homework was a way educators helped you understand the lessons.

Well, I personally have been doing some God homework. It seems God is trying to teach me a lesson or two. To say this summer has been trying is an understatement. It seems a new trial appears daily while I am still trying to understand the last trial which is not resolved. I even found myself just wanting to give up and throw in the towel. This homework God has assigned has left me weary, teary eyed, and sometimes even angry.

You have to understand that learning a lesson has always been difficult for me. Take math for example. One of my earliest memories is of second grade and trying to understand how 2 + 2=4. Then ninth grade comes along and we are expected to grasps the concept of A + B + C=D. Seriously! I was still working on the 2 + 2 issue. Next came Geometry and well, we will not even go into the frustration that course brought me. I was so bad in math that when I went to college I started out in beginner Algebra for no credit. After hours of homework and paying for tutors, I finally understood enough of math to pass the needed courses. Let me just say that when I learned I never had to take another math course again I shouted for joy.

While I am working through God assigned homework, I am learning that no amount of peanut M & Ms will solve the problem. I must be willing to let Him be the teacher and to show me, very slowly, how things will work out for the best. My only lesson book is The Word. There are days when the only prayers I can mutter are scriptures. On some days I feel I have passed homework, but on other days I know I have failed miserably.

I hate homework! Always have and always will. However, God has assigned this homework for me to draw closer to Him and to understand that His plan is much greater than what I can imagine.

So girlfriends, how are you doing on your God homework?

Looking For Some Fun?

2011-09-05T08:04:00.000-07:00

This is a big week for Tennessee ministers wives. Our state convention thinks that their ministers wives are important so they are providing a retreat (September 9-10) at their Baptist camp at Carson Springs. As one of the retreat planning team members, I can tell you that if you do not laugh, fellowship, let your hair down, or go home refreshed then it will be your own fault.

The retreat theme is Friendship and Chocolate-The Rich Things in Life. (You should know me by now that chocolate is a daily part of my life). The ladies that have worked on this retreat are all chocoholics, and although we have only met a couple of times, we have developed a friendship. We have laughed, worked, brainstormed, and yes, ate chocolate getting ready for this event.

Girlfriends, I promise that you will be richly blessed at the retreat. First, you get to stay in beautiful east Tennessee. Nature just cries out the glory of God there. Second, you get to fellowship with other ladies who walk in your shoes. No one understands a minister’s wife better than other ministers wives. Third, you DO NOT have to wear a dress, panty hose are a no-no and you CAN have fun. (Makeup and doing your hair are optional as well). Fourth, God has provided this retreat to refresh, renew, and for relaxation. You do not have to prove yourself to anyone and you get to have some alone time with God and girlfriends.

I hope you are able to attend the retreat. To registered, check out the Tennessee Baptist Convention website at www.tnministerswives.org or contact Lana Rose, Ministers Wives Ministries for TBC, at 1-800-558-2090, ext. 2008.

See you there!

Tthe Discipline of Endurance

2011-09-02T06:25:00.000-07:00

Ministry definitely requires endurance. There are times when it seems all we are doing is enduring. Yet, I do not believe the Lord wanted our service to Him to be about tolerating and making it through. I know He wants to use everything that comes into our lives to prepare us of His Kingdom in eternity.

Hebrews 12:1-2 “Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every weight and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne.”

Witnesses – We are being watched! Not news to a minister’s wife is it? There are those who are watching that love us and are praying and those who are watching that are not on our side and criticizing. In spite of this, we should be encouraged to endure, for there are those who are watching that are waiting to share eternity with us.

Lay Aside – Sometimes the reason enduring is so difficult is because we are weighed down with the things of this world. Lust, greed, selfishness, laziness, gossip, unforgiveness; the list goes on and can be identified as SIN. Sin is very heavy to carry which is why Paul says, “lay aside.”

Keep Eyes on Jesus - This is definitely the key! Endurance will be there when we need it if our focus is on Jesus. He is our strength and our joy!

– We will not give up if we are looking to Jesus. Instead of trying to get out of our circumstances we need to ask to be “perfected” in our faith. Rejoice in the race because eventually you will be with the Father.

Discipline is not easy and in Hebrews it says that it is painful, but if we endure we are promised that we will yield the fruit of peace and righteousness! I want that, how about you?

The Discipline of Witnessing

2011-08-30T06:16:00.000-07:00

A sweet friend of mine sent me a prayer she was praying about her fear of sharing Christ. I was touched by her prayer and asked her if I could share it with you.

I pray it will encourage and push you to speak up for our Lord, as it did me.

“Dear Lord,

I pray for boldness, opportunities and words of wisdom as a witness for Christ.

Christ had a job to do while He was here on earth and He left a job for me to do. As more people accept Christ, His Kingdom expands, one soul at a time.

Jesus Christ suffered far too much for me to cowardly or selfishly walk away from witnessing. I can never say that God is asking too much of me.

My personality traits would like to be a convenient excuse for not telling others about Jesus.

I find always, Christ’s strength in my weaknesses.”

This is a simple, yet sincere prayer for discipline to witness. Ask God to allow you to boldly proclaim Him to someone today.

Romans 1:16 “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is God’s power for salvation to everyone who believes.”

Discipline Determines Destiny

2011-08-29T06:11:00.000-07:00

I heard Dr. Charles Stanley speak on discipline this week. I am always interested in that topic as it is something I continually ask God to develop in my life.

As your children go back to school they are going to be called to a much stricter schedule than most of us experience in the summer months. I often hear mother’s exclaim that they are looking forward to getting back to a routine. They are actually saying it will be good to have some discipline in our family’s life again.

Sometimes we think of discipline in a negative way, yet it is absolutely essential for us to have a productive life.

Dr. Stanley’s message was focused on spiritual disciplines. They were simple, yet not negotiable if we want to grow in our faith and be used by God.

Let me give you a quick review with a small adjustment for minister’s wives.

1. Read God’s Word everyday. (Ask God to speak to you, listen and obey)

2. Pray everyday. (This is not missionaries and food prayer time; this is time to give your all to God. Asking for Him to control, lead and protect. This is your time to get right with God. Complete honesty.)

3. Tithe. (Are you thinking, “I’m a minister’s wife, I have to tithe or my husband will loose his job!” How about bringing your tithes into the storehouse with joy and worship. How about tithing your body, energy, family. Acknowledge that everything you have is on loan from a generous, loving Father.)

4. Attend Worship every Sunday. (Really? Do you have a choice? What about getting your heart ready to truly worship before you walk into that church? Do you allow God to shine His light into your heart so you can be ready to focus completely on Him?)

We all have weaknesses and strengths. This is a good time to allow God to shore up some disciplines in our lives.

If discipline determines our destiny, then we must desire discipline. As minister’s wives we want to grow, serve, form deeper relationships, have impact on those around us. Ask God to help you be more disciplined for His glory!

PRAYER REQUESTS

2011-08-27T09:01:00.000-07:00

I teach 6th graders in a small rural school and it seems that we have several students that are in need of URGENT prayer.

PLEASE REMEMBER THE FOLLOWING IN YOUR PRAYERS:

One of our 6th grade girls is fighting cancer that started in her kidneys. She is home bound and not able to attend school right now. (She is not doing well at all.)

One of our 6th grade boys is severe diabetic. He is on a pump and also receives 3-4 shots per day. He has to go to the nurse between each class to be checked. He also has all three types of seizures. (He is attending school, so he is doing okay, but needs our prayers.)

One of our 6th grade boys is living in a foster home and this is one of many that he has lived in in the past few years. My heart just goes out to him and I would like for you to say some special prayers for him.

One of the 7th grade girls; our student from last year, is still battling melanoma and taking treatment two days a week. (She is attending school three days a week and doing pretty good, but still needs our prayers. She will be taking treatments until March 2012.)

Another of our girls from last year has recently been diagnosed with SMA.... spinal muscular atrophy. (Her future does not look very good. It is a crippling disease.)

Thanks you in advance for your prayers!!!

WAKE UP AMERICA!!!

2011-08-26T08:40:00.000-07:00

Wake Up America!!!

Okay, is it just me, or do all of you feel like God is trying to speak to the folks in Washington, DC? I mean...HELLO....!!! We need to continue to pray for America. There have been lots of laws made and taken away that directly conflict the Bible.

God is capable of anything, so an earthquake is not an unheard of "wake-up" call.
I got an e-mail that said that it had been confirmed that the supposedly 5+ earthquake in Washington, DC was nothing but our Founding Fathers rolling over in their graves!!! Can you imagine their reaction if they could come back to earth and witness our government today?

Let's continue to pray for America!!! Regardless of what is going on, God is still in control. ....I think He proved that point Tuesday.

Missed Ya!!!

2011-08-25T20:01:00.001-07:00

Man's Best Friend

2011-08-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

We have two Grand-dogs; Fanny and Lady Bird. They love us unconditionally. They both get very excited to go to Dayton to visit us. When they see us they get so excited that they fall all over the place, jump and just go wild.

We can fuss at them, punish them and even ignore them and they will both still sit and patiently wait for us to show them some attention.

We go to the kitchen. They follow. We go to the bedroom. They follow. We go to the bathroom. They follow. No matter where we go or what we do they are right there beside us if we allow it. If we are having a bad day, are short with them, etc., they forgive us and love us anyway. They both just love to play and be nearby.

Wouldn’t it be great if we had that type of forgiveness and love for each other? Shouldn't be strive to love our neighbors like that?

God does!!! He loves us unconditionally. If we are angry, upset, or just in a bad mood, God is still right there with us. It does not make any difference where we go, God is with us.

God is always right there, patiently waiting for us to slow down long enough to spend time with Him whether it is by spending time in the Word or by talking to him in Prayer.

I do not mean to make light of God’s love for us by comparing it to the devotion that pets have for their owners, however true dog lovers will understand what I am trying to say. The devotion and commitment that a dog has to his owner is hard for humans to comprehend because we allow STUFF to get in the way of our care for each other. However, God's love and devotion to us is MUCH GREATER than anything we can imagine; even greater than the devotion that a dog his to his owner.

The old phrase is : "A dog is man's best friend." However, GOD is truly MAN's BEST FRIEND!!!

May we be just as committed to God as our pets are to us and may we strive to love each other unconditionally as God loves us!!!

Happy Anniversary!!!

2011-08-22T07:00:00.000-07:00

Thirty-two years ago this month I married my best friend. We dated for seven years and were each other’s first date, so we have been together for thirty-nine years….which is interesting since I am only 39 years old. Smile. Please notice the preacher on the left, which is my dad and the preacher on the right is my father-in-law. Both of them have since gone on to be with our Lord and are greatly missed. However, they told us with both of them tying the knot, there was NO WAY we would ever be able to un-do it. Smile.

The older I get the more I realize that we are in the minority and what a precious gift we have been awarded. Even in our church, very few marriages have lasted this long. Someone asked me last year at my school how I had kept a man faithful that long…….I jokingly told them that I had this marriage thing figured out…. Some men marry a pretty, skinny blonde that stays that way and by mid-life they are bored so they stray. My husband, Roger married me and he has had skinny, medium, large, extra large obese and he has had a blonde, brunette, red-head, striped head, etc. With me he has experienced it all without having to stray. Smile.

All jokes aside, what has happened to the sanction of marriage? Many times divorce is unavoidable for one reason or another, but it seems as if most couples just see it as the easy way out. A successful marriage is not easy and does not come without hard work. Years ago, my dad told me that marriage is something that does not just happen; it is something that you have to work at for the rest of your life. I have since, realized the truth of that bit of wisdom. First, God has to be the head of the home and marriage. Then, the husband and wife have to work together and make compromises for things work. It is a two way street!

Our son will be getting married in just a little over four months. The oldest member of our church, Mrs. Mahalia who is 97 years old, told him that once you are married….there will be TWO and not ONE. You must always remember that and always consider each others feelings and opinions. My, what simple, but wise advice! You can bet he won’t forget that either because while telling him she had that little crooked finger, bent and pointing at him with an ORDER and not a request. Smile.

Mark 10:9 says….What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

I thank God every day for my best friend, my husband. My prayers are that not only will our children live and experience this type of love, but they will pass that tradition on down to their children.

My challenge to you is to set the example for the younger generations and encourage them. Be there for them. Be honest and let them know that it is not easy and is not always going to be a bed of roses, but with God’s help, they can have a long and successful marriage and beat the statistics.

Wisdom

2011-08-19T09:55:00.000-07:00

Obviously, from last two posts, I am seeking wisdom.

The tasks before me are great and I am humbled that God has given me these responsibilities. Not only am I a steward of my children (They are ultimately His), I am also responsible to reflect Christ in every aspect of my life. After all, He is the One who placed me in each situation and circumstance. The people in my life are not there by coincidence. It is all a part of His bigger plan. I am just honored to be included in it.

So, how do I handle these situations? Do I shelter my kids? How can I be transparent? I came to the conclusion a long time ago that it would be so much easier if God had just added a book to the Bible with my name as its title. I know, I know, then I would again take too much on myself, not trust God and my faith would not ever grow.

I HAVE to seek God. I HAVE to find my wisdom in Him. He HAS to be the source of my discernment. Only then will I find myself in His will. Only then will I make the right decisions. Only then will my family -and my church- be blessed for it.

So today, I want to leave you some verses that God has encouraged me with over the last week or so.

"No wisdom, no understanding, no counsel can avail against the Lord.

The horse is made ready for battle, but the victory belongs to the Lord."

Proverbs 21:30-31

"Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future."

Proverbs 19:20

"The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things."

Proverbs 15:28

"The wisest of women builds her house but folly with her own hands tears it down."

Proverbs 14:1

"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom."

Proverbs 11:2

I could go on and on. Can you tell my daily Bible reading has been in the book of Proverbs! =)

Have a blessed weekend and remember we are all sisters on similar journeys.

Transparency

2011-08-18T19:14:00.000-07:00

Parenting as a minister's family definitely has some interesting challenges. We are in a unique position as many in our congregations look to us for the "right" way to raise their own children. However, in the some situations preachers and preachers' kids have not set a good example.

Ministers' children get a bad rap and the stereotypes are far from favorable. Unfortunately, many these kids deserved that bad press. BUT, I don't believe that they are entirely to blame. After all, where are their parents? Oh yeah, committee meetings and programmed events!

My husband and I have been in student ministry for many years, and in my experience loving on this truly unique type of young person, I have found that like all teens, they long for transparency and sincerity. Yes, many times the preacher's son or daughter "shares" their dad and their mom with the entire church. They grow up in a fish bowl with the whole congregation criticizing even their smallest, inconsequential decisions.

I believe these kids can live with all that pressure and even thrive in the midst of church politics if the faith they see their parents live out is sincere. The hardest place to walk the closest to Christ is home. Our kids know when we are being real or just putting on a show. Sometimes we have to put on the "show" at church - but what about at home?

Let me encourage you to pray with your kids, cry with your kids, worship with your kids. Let them see you walk in faith. If it is hard, let them see it. Their lives won't always be easy. Show them what to do. Lead by example. Go to your Jesus for your strength so that one day they will do the same.

They don't have to know every detail, but be real. It is okay for them to see you angry. They can relate to that emotion. They need to hear you say you were wrong and that you are sorry. Remember that once your child accepts Christ, he or she is no longer just your child, he or she is also your brother or sister in Christ. Our kids need to be discipled - by us!

Now as my oldest starts the third grade she is more than ever aware of the good, the bad and the ugly in the world and, unfortunately, in the church. I have to pray for guidance and I let her hear me say that I need the Lord's help. I try to point her back to Jesus every chance I get. Someday, she may think I sound silly or corny, but I pray my testimony will show that I am sincere. I pray my transparency will help her authenticity in her own walk with our mutual Savior. I pray that in her own way, her own genuine faith, she will break the mold of what it means to be a preacher's daughter.

What are some things you are intentional to do in order to be transparent with your kids?

To Shelter or Not to Shelter?

2011-08-17T11:59:00.000-07:00

Recently, I was apart of prayer group consisting of mainly minister and deacon wives. The group meets monthly and despite what may be happening at their church, everyone will remain relatively mum on a certain topic. They have prayed each other through births, adoptions, deaths, illnesses, marital stresses and many other topics. The one topic they will always mention, but never elaborate on is the health of their church.

Their church IS going through a really rough season and it was on every one's mind that night. Yet, no one wanted to cross that invisible line and broach the subject of the giant elephant in the room. Then, one minister's wife did.

She is hurt. She is angry. She is bitter. At first, her comments were more subtle and veiled. Then they weren't. She openly blamed her church, the one her husband serves, as the reason her middle child refuses to darken the doors of any church.

The room grew really silent really fast. It was like all the oxygen had been sucked out of the room. No one made eye contact with anyone else. No made any excuses or apologies. She wouldn't have accepted them if they had. No one really acknowledged her comment. They let her keep explaining her prayer request with more slights on the church.

Honestly, I don't know all the details of her and her husband's situation. I do know enough that her feelings are justifiable. Obviously, over the years she had her husband have spoken openly with their teen children about what has happened at the church. Maybe more of their conversations needed to have taken place behind a closed bedroom door instead of at the kitchen table over dinner. I don't know. I wasn't there.

However, since that evening, I have wondered and asked myself how much of the "drama" that happens at the church should my children know? Should I treat certain issues with them in the same way I would another church attender or member? Then again, they aren't just any church member are they?

So ladies what do you think? Should I or shouldn't I shelter my kiddos from the politics of the church? If I do, how, and at what age do I stop?

By the way, please pray for this sweet family, this church and the futures of all involved!

Heartbreaking Headlines

2011-08-11T07:11:00.000-07:00

The August 3rd edition of the Baptist & Reflector, Tennessee Baptist’s statewide newspaper, arrived at our home two days ago and my heart has been heavy and broken ever since. The headline on the first page reads, “Fifty-five Tennessee ministers forced to resign in 2010.” 55!! AND…across the Southern Baptist Convention, there were 609!!! 609!!

Immediately I had to read the article in its entirety….and became more and more distressed and heartbroken and at a loss as to what I can do to help these wives. These families. You might be one of those 55 or perhaps you are one of the 609 who were forced to resign your ministry position in 2010.

The number one reason for termination was stated as “Control issues—who is going to run the church”. I KNOW that no one is perfect. I am totally aware that there are issues on both sides….but I cannot help being frustrated right now with people in the church. Control issues? Seriously? Who is in control? The people who “belong” or “go” to the church? The pastor? The pastor’s wife? NO! God is in control!!!

Last night in our Bible study one lady shared that her greatest fear is losing control….and we all related to her. We are control freaks! We want to be in charge. We want things our way. We think we can do it better than anyone and everyone—and ridiculous as it sounds—we think we can do it even better than God can!

If you are a wife of a minister who has been forced to resign, please know that I am praying for you. I cannot imagine how you must feel. You have been put in a very difficult place with a huge opportunity to allow God to love on you. To allow Him to forgive through you. To enable you to persevere through. You will know God in a way you never knew Him before. He is Provider. Comforter. Lover.

I am praying for you as you stand firm in your faith. As you encourage your discouraged husband. As you teach your children how to handle adversity like Jesus did. As you run the race with endurance with your eyes fixed on Jesus. Do NOT give up the race!! Do NOT quit!! Run my friend run....not away...but into the arms of God.

You are not alone. He knows how you feel. Please let me know how I can serve you. encourage you. Help you.

HELP!!

2011-08-09T07:49:00.000-07:00

For the last several weeks I have been praying, pondering and preparing to speak to Tennessee minister’s wives about Friendship at the East TN Ministers Wives' Retreat at Carson Springs Conference Center on September 9-10. I am super excited to get to meet many of you face to face and get to know you!! Here’s the deal….I would LOVE to have your input and your help!

Would you be willing to spend some time thinking about the following questions and then email me your responses to jgang@aeneas.net? You can be sure that your answers will be kept confidential and will be ever so helpful to me as I pursue this topic.

Loneliness and lack of friends are two of the top issues that minister’s wives struggle with and I want to hear your stories. Your victories. Your struggles. What has worked for you? What has not worked for you? So….feel free to make any comments, share anything you want with me….even if it is not directly related to a question.

Thank you so much!!

Do you feel like you have friends where you currently live? (i.e. not from high school or college or previous churches)

What percentage of your friends are in your church and what percentage do not attend your church?

What do you want/need in a friend?

How do you go about making friends? About how long does it take you to make friends when you move to a new ministry?

Why do you think it is sometimes difficult for minister’s wives to have friends?

Again....feel free to make any comments, share anything you want with me….even if it is not directly related to a question!

Lightning Bugs and Lemonade

2011-08-02T12:57:00.000-07:00

The summer is just flying by too fast. I can honestly say I have not accomplished the needed housework (cleaning out closets and drawers, yard work, etc) that I had on my summer to-do list. My outdoor walks have been slow and few due to the heat wave that Tennessee is experiencing. I just do not like to sweat unless there is a pool nearby. Another thing I wanted to do this summer is fix up my deck area, sip lemonade at dusk and watch the lightning bugs come out to play.

Okay, maybe I am being a little nostalgic. I remember as a little girl chasing lightning bugs through our neighborhood and capturing them in jars. Parents would sit in the yard or on the porch sipping lemonade or iced tea while children squealed with laughter capturing lightning bugs.

At a certain point all the parents would decide that it was time to go inside for the night. I would place my jar of magical creatures on a table in my room, wash my sweaty, little body, and pull on the pajamas. My parents would tuck me in bed, say prayers, and turn out the lights. I admit I was afraid of the dark; however, my magical little lightning bugs would put off a soft, comforting glow that chased away the evil in the dark corners of my room.

As I remember this point in my childhood, I smile. Life back then was difficult for our parents. They worked hard and had to stretch their dollars just like we have to now. However, sitting on the porch or in the yard with neighbors sipping lemonade or iced tea did not cost them anything but a little time. Playing chase with friends or capturing lightning bugs were just part of a child's life growing up in the south.

I may be stretching things a little today but stick with me. I can just imagine our heavenly Father watching his children take a break from the daily toil of life. God does not want us to go at a fast face like the world wants us to. The Father desires his children to slow down and enjoy the little things like lemonade and lightning bugs. I think He wants us to sit in the yard and chat with neighbors. Personally, I think it would be fun to chase and capture lightning bugs again. I could use a soft, comforting glow to chase away the stresses of this world.

The Standard

2011-07-31T13:47:00.000-07:00

Our niece, Michaella, is visiting us this week from Louisiana. It is a special visit because she wanted to come spend time with us before she starts college this fall. She also mentioned that I was her favorite aunt (girlfriends, I'm her only aunt) and that I like to have fun. Let me just say that aunt and niece had a blast making No Bake Chocolate Drop Cookies and licking the pan on Friday night. Yep, she is a chocoholic like me!

Well, last night Michaella and her Uncle Ricky began discussing the family tradition. You see, my husband is a Louisiana Tech University graduate and Michaella will begin her freshman year there this fall. The Bulldog tradition carries further in the family because Michaella's dad, my brother, and our oldest son and his wife are all Tech grads.

In a true preacher voice, Ricky advice to Michaella went something like this: "Michaella, the standard has been set. You must keep the Tech tradition pure and holy. You must excel to be your best. You must rise to the level of a true Bulldog. Michaella, are you ready and able to be a Bulldog?" Michaella was giggling and I was just rolling my eyes. Funny how my blonde brain works. As Ricky and Michaella were bantering back and forth the qualilites of being a Louisiana Tech Bulldog, I was thinking on the standard set by Jesus.

Our Savior calls for us to rise to His standards. No, we will never be perfect, but we are to live our lives in such a way that is pure and holy. We are to strive to live our lives in a way that calls men, women, and children to the saving grace of our Lord. Jesus cheers us on to walk the narrow road and stay with the tradition of God's family.

I hope that one day when Michaella walks across the stage to receive her college diploma we are sitting in the stands cheering her on. More importantly I hope that when I walk through the gates of heaven and bow before the throne of God that He is cheering, "Well done my child!"

Trust In God Alone

2011-07-29T07:05:00.000-07:00

I am very grateful for the mentors, teachers, family members that have taught me about my God. I have been give opportunities for me to grow and learn from His Word in the ministry than most people. What a blessing!

As I read some of the past blogs of my sisters, the reoccurring theme was difficult situations. This life we are living here and now is a constant classroom of preparation for eternity. No one is surprised to hear of tragedy or disasters in the news. We expect it, we even get a little harden to it.

This week a sweet young minister's wife shared with me the hurt she was experiencing in her church. As I listened, I was hurt with her, angry, judgmental (of the church) and disappointed in some church leaders. (had to spend some time repenting and forgiving)

When these emotions, feelings and thoughts come into my life, I have learned to RUN to God's Word. Listen to what God said - I love Him!!!

Psalm 62 - vs 1-2"I am at rest in GOD ALONE; my salvation comes from Him. He ALONE is my rock and my salvation, my strong hold; I will never be shaken. vs 5 Rest in God ALONE, my soul, for my hope comes from Him. He ALONE is my rock and my salvation, my stronghold; I will not be shaken. vs. 8 Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour our your hearts before Him. God is our refuge."

When people let us down ( and they will) remember God will never let us down - Trust in Him ALONE and do not be shaken!

Forget About Seeking God's Will for Your Life

2011-07-27T06:44:00.000-07:00

I read the words in the title of this blog in the book, "Forgotten God" by Frances Chan. That statement definitely caught my attention.

As I have journeyed with the Lord these past 50 or so years, I have often asked God what He wanted me to do. As a pastor's wife, the church had many ideas for God's will in my life. Many times I just let them lead me along and sometimes fell flat on my face trying to please them.

I don't think it is wrong to listen to ideas from friends and church members, it is good to hear about needs and places to serve, but God definitely has a plan and we will only suceed when we are in the middle of His plan. If that is true, how do we know His plan, particularly if I just told you to stop seeking His will for your life.

We have God's Word, Godly people, prayer, circumstances and God living in us (Holy Spirit)to give us direction. Yet as you study His Word, you will find, that He called people to go without much detail.

Abraham packed his bags and began to walk - he had no idea where. Noah built a boat when he had never seen a flood or even rain. Peter went to a deserted road to wait for someone for some reason.

The list goes on and I believe each example is there to remind us we are to walk in faith, guided by the Holy Spirit.

I recommend this book, "Forgotten God". He teaches us to seek the Spirit's leading in our life not God's will for my life. Is there a difference? Yes, we will never make a mistake when the Spirit is leading because His job is to reveal the Father's will to us. When I am personally seeking God's will ( on my own), it is easy to rationalize, compromise, people please or even disobey.

The Holy Spirit will never lead you contrary to God's will. Begin to ask Him to lead you today.

Ministers Wives Retreat--East TN

2011-07-25T13:10:00.000-07:00

Ministers Wives, it is time to register for our East TN Ministers Wives Retreat at CarsonSprings Conference Center, September 9-10. You can find the registration information and lodging information at www.tnministerswives.org. You can register online but you must call CarsonSprings for your lodging.

Our theme is "Friendship and Chocolate--The Rich Things in Life." Breakouts include "Finding the Joy in Ministry," "Penny Pinching," "Count Your Hugs & Kisses of Ministry," and "The Richness of Being Real."

Our main speaker will be Dana James from Greenwood IN with "Voice of Mercy" leading us in Worship. Registration will begin at 1:00 on Friday with the first breakout at 2:00 and will conclude on Saturday with lunch. Many fun things are planned for Friday night so make your plans now to join us at CarsonSprings, September 9-10. And of course there will be plenty of chocolate!!

Boasting and Pleasure

2011-07-25T06:15:00.000-07:00

I was reading in 2 Corinthians 12 this week. I came to the passage where Paul began to list the things he had experienced as he shared Christ. I am sure you are familiar with this passage, but take time to read this list with me again.

Many more imprisonments - far worse beatings - near death many times - five times I received 39 lashes - three times I was beaten with rods - once I was stoned by my enemies - three times I was shipwrecked - I spent a night and a day in open sea - dangers from rivers - dangers from robbers - dangers from my own people - dangers from Gentiles - dangers in the city - dangers in the open country - dangers on the sea - dangers among false brothers - labor and hardship - many sleepless nights - hunger and thirst - often without food - cold - lacking clothing -daily pressure on me - my care for all the churches -thorn in the flesh - a messenger of Satan to torment me

Let me ask you a question? Have you experienced trials lately? Are you discouraged? Is the battle making you weary, stealing your joy, challenging your faith?

As I read Paul's description of the things he had and was experiencing, I had to stop and thank God for His great mercy in my own life. There have been difficult situations, hard times, disappointments, loses and conflicts, yet I cannot relate to Paul's life.

Let's now read what Paul decided to do with all these experiences.

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Therefore, I will most gladly BOAST all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may reside in me. So I take PLEASURE in weaknesses, insults, catastrophes, persecutions, and in pressures, because of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Dear Sisters in Christ, I am not diminishing the fact that you may be suffering, but I challenge you to BOAST in Christ - take PLEASURE in His strength and make His Name Famous as those around you watch!

Lost Sheep

2011-07-22T05:00:00.000-07:00

"Oh, where oh where have our church members gone? Oh, what, oh, what are they doing?"

Maybe our church is unique, but I do not think so. I fear this is a wide-spread trend. During the Winter our attendance suffers because of the cold, bad weather. During the Summer it suffers because of vacations, the lake and just over-all laziness. Our attendance is always much better in the Spring and Fall.

Why is it that some folks feel they only need church two seasons a year? I love all of the excuses!!! All of the church members are important. Anytime anyone misses, there is a missing link to the puzzle. I wonder what they would do if the pastor and pastor’s wife decided they would just like to sleep in one Sunday???

We have tried planning “special activities” to bring them in especially during the summer, but that still does not work.

Do not get me wrong….our faithful members are their year round for most if not all of the services. However, we have a large chunk of members that are part-time members.

Maybe they are stronger than me and maybe they do not get as hungry as I do. I could not survive without being fed every Sundays and every Wednesday. I can not imagine going weeks without food.

The little town that we live in still has the snow cone trucks that go around the neighborhoods playing their music and drawing folks out to the truck to buy snow cones in the hot weather. Maybe we need to get us a truck with a large billboard and drive it around the neighborhood of the church, while playing the music of “Oh, where, oh, where have our church member gone….”

Smile. <

Busy Summer

2011-07-21T06:37:00.000-07:00

Rock-A-Bye-Baby

2011-07-20T20:45:00.000-07:00

Well this is only our 15th year to pastor, but our 32nd year in the Ministry. This weekend was our FIRST Infant Funeral. How sad!!! The baby was a beautiful, perfect little boy, weighing 5 lbs. 7 oz. and was a week early. The pregnancy went uneventful and then suddenly mom went into Preeclampsia, without the usual warning signs. They rushed her to the hospital and did an emergency c-section, but it was too late for the boy. His blood supply had been cut off and he was born dead. They almost lost mom too. It was a touch and go for five days.

I had never even attended an infant funeral. The hospital had a photographer that came in and made lots of beautiful photos of baby Bo Thomas and gave the CD to the parents. Since mom had a very hard time and almost lost her life, she never got to see her son, so the pictures were extra special. The CD was playing at the funeral home.

The family had picked out the songs that were played but they broke my heart. They played Rock-a-Bye-Baby, Jesus Love Me and a couple of others. It was so sad.

My heart just goes out to this couple. I can not think of anything worse than losing a child that you have planned for, loved and nurtured for nine months.

I know that God has a purpose for everything and we are not to question, but it is hard, humanly, to make sense of this. As a pastor’s wife, it was hard for me to know how to give comfort to the parents, so all I did was hug them and hold them and tell them I was praying. You can not say, “at least he is not hurting anymore” or “he sure lived a long life…”

Okay…..for future reference….all of you “more experienced pastor’s wives”….PLEASE give me some advice on dealing with infant death. Thanks Bunches!!!